S: Monica's Mommy Book
FC: Monica's Mommy Book
1: Dear Monica, You and Brandon are two of the most fun loving and carrying people we have ever known. You are always there for everyone whenever you are needed and always give more of yourselves than you ever take. We have no doubts that you will both be fantastic parents to Kristopher. You have all the love, patience, and kindness that it takes to make the best parents. But when lack of experience gets you lost along the way, here are some words of wisdom from all your mommy friends who have been there before you. We love you so much and can't wait to see what a beautiful mother you are.
2: Lyndsay and Jackson | You don't have to be perfect, you just have to love your son and try your best | The first 100 days are the hardest, it all turns around after that Don't let the baby divide you, it's you and Brandon against him. He's the common enemy, don't forget that ;) Whatever works, works. If you have to sing the same song 200 times or jump up and down like a fool to make your baby happy, so be it
3: Try and shower everyday, you'd be amazed what a shower can do for your reason to live Take the time to be selfish. You will be a better mommy after a hair cut or a manicure Try and find the humor in things, when you are exhausted and frustrated sometimes the only thing to do is hold each other and laugh
5: my baby girl, It is hard to imagine my baby having a baby, I have watched you grow from a tiny baby into an amazing, loving, giving, beautiful, and talented young woman. And now a soon to be mom. I am not good at expressing my feelings, or at least telling you in the way I am trying to convey them, but I will say that each time I gave birth it was miraculous. Truly an indescribable experience, a combination of many emotional feelings. Some you will remember for the rest of your life, some you will not. With the birth of each of my children I was amazed at each experience, different, exciting, and unique in its own way. Each being totally different as I am sure each mother experiences and I think you will too. It is something that you cannot believe just happened to you. How this little being you are holding in your arms, with eyes, nose, fingers, toes, and a HEART grew inside is now your very own child, a part of your being.
6: Each child is a Miracle from God, their own little person that looks a little like Mom and Dad that will expand the growth of your heart each day, onto so much love that it seems your heart cannot hold anymore, and that your heart is about to explode. But as the next day unfolds, your child will make your heart grow even more. | There will be so many times in your child's life there will be joys and triumphs, lots of fun adventures, many first times, all exciting and new. There may be days when you are having feelings of inadequacy, sometimes doubting whether or not you did the right thing for your child or if you are doing the right things for your child. GO WITH YOUR HEART, no matter the circumstance, if you feel in your heart what you are doing is right, then it will be.
8: First of all, Babies: You know I grew up without a mom so I didn't have a lot of people to teach me how to be a mommy. But I do remember my Nana saying to me more than once when I was playing with my dolls :Love them, but don't spoil them. I told my children 10 times a day at least I loved them but I put them down sometimes when I wanted to hold them, I didn't run to them and pick them up the minute they cried (but I did peak to make sure they were okay) and I never woke a sleeping baby. My world didn't stop because I had a baby, it readjusted. Just Love Them. | Gail
9: Teenagers: You have to feel bad for them cause they have a brain like a pea but they think it's a boulder. They think you have STUPID written on your forehead. Pace yourself through these years. Pick your battles (there may be many) and try and have fun. Grow with them. They really are fun, just can be annoying. I think the hardest think was giving them their freedom a little at a time and watching the decisions they made. Some of my favorite sayings during these years: Because I am not Johnny's mother, that's why. You can do it and my serious one was the younger ones would ask why Greg can do it and we can't I would say with age comes privilege. Just love them.
10: 20's, 30's, and 40's: At this point they are (hopefully) adults, You sit back loot at the person they become and smile and know that you and Brandon had big hands in this. Be proud. Continue to give advice to them but in an adult way. Don't have your feelings hurt if they don't take it. Be a little tough skinned cause you won't always see eye to eye with them. You'll wonder at times what the heck are they thinking but you'll bite your tongue. We dud the same to our parents. The word stupid is erased from your forehead and replaced with the phrase: that's not how we do it. Just love them.
11: On a final note: love your children but never forget you were Brandon and Monica first, don't loose sight of that because if you don't take care of your relationship you can't be the best mommy and daddy as we know you will be awesome parents. Always keep in mine the day will come when the last one will leave home and you will be empty nesters. You want to be able to look at each other, smile, and say you are my best friend, I love you, job well done, and go off and enjoy the rest of your life while you wait for precious grandchildren to arrive. Just love them. | Gail
12: Let dad share in the joy of caring for the baby
14: Tracy and Khya
15: Monica, To my sweet, sear, amazing friend who is so perfect for the role she is about to take on for the first time... Kristopher is a lucky, lucky little man. This is such a natural think for you, so I don't think you need advice, but I know a little here and there can always soothe your worries. First of all, most importantly enjoy EVERY single moment. The late nights, the breast feeding frustrations, the spit-up stain on your shoulder every time you look in the mirror, the no shower until 8pm because you just didn't have a moment to yourself. Enjoy it. As soon as it passes, you will miss it. I promise. | Tracy and Khya
16: Take it one day at a time Trust your gut, always, momma knows best It's okay to cry when baby cries | You will NOT spoil your child by holding him too much, despite what everyone says... it teaches baby trust, to be loved, and how to have a compassionate soul as well
17: Capture the smiles AND the frowns on camera because baby needs to know how cute he is even when he isn't smiling | Sarah and Dominic
18: As your child grows, he will give you some heartache and trials but that completely overrides all of the joys you will experience. You will come to realize every moment is a blessing, good or bad. I have no doubt with you and Brandon as Kristopher's parents there will be plenty of love. He is going to be a very lucky little boy. I cannot see anything that you would do that would made either of you anything more than the best parents in the world. I am so looking forward to holding my newest grandson and spending many happy times with all of you. I know Kristopher will be added to the loves of my life. I feel it was God who gave me this special gift, finally to be able to have a grandchild close enough to enjoy some of his firsts along with you and Brandon. I love you with all of my heart Mom
20: Brandon and Linda | The first couple of months you will be sleep deprived. So I suggest napping when your baby does, it will make those 2am feedings more bearable
23: Have the babies far apart so you always have someone to mow your grass (Frank)
24: 1-First of all, you must be flexible and at first let them set up the daily routine, then you follow it 2-Ask for HELP if you need it-it is not a sign of failure and EVERY new mommy needs help sometimes | 3- Have some alone time, a nice bubble bath with a good book and ear plugs 4-Have a preemie outfit to bring the baby home from the hospital even newborn sizes are too big | Renee
25: 5-When other people offer advice, just say oh uh huh... then do it however it works best for you and your baby 6-Your body and brain CAN run on little or no sleep for the first 6 weeks until your baby gets its days and nights straightened out | 7-They say when you are pregnant you lose your brain, it NEVER come back haha 8-Always praise your children and enjoy every minute of being a mommy, they grow up waaaaay too fast
26: Secondly, let Kristopher (and future Blasi babies) tighten the glue between you and Brandon. Frankie would have his own special time with Khya, feeding her, bathing her, holding her, it made him more of a man in my eyes, and there is nothing sexier than that. be parents together, and listen to Brandon's suggestions too (that was hard for me at times) It shows respect and allows him to actually feel like a daddy and half of the team, Just know when times get frustrating with the baby, Brandon is with you to help you figure things out-the tighter the team, the better parents you will be
28: Monica, This time coming up will be the most wonderful, stressful, blessed, wild ride of your life. I can not wait for you to now the instant joy and completely overwhelming, all-encompassing love that you will feel towards your child (and to finally understand how much your mother loves you) It is a love like you can not even imagine, and never knew existed. I don't think that you need any advice because you were born to be a mother, you are a natural, and you are ready. But I will tell you some of the things I have learned along the way. Be patient with Brandon, boys are different, they do not have the instincts we do (my mom says they are practically brain damaged) He will never do anything as well as you, but let him try, let him have a turn, and don't critique all the same things. Take the time to enjoy each moment, don't get so caught up in making sure the house is clean, and the laundry is done that you forget to slow down and enjoy every minute. Watch Kristopher sleep, let him sleep on your chest for hours instead of putting him down to vacuum. Find the joy in every phase, even the screaming all night, throw up on your shoulder, haven't had a shower in 3 days phase. Never wish he would just grow out of it, because he will and you will look back and laugh and those days. How frantic he is when you are changing him, the way he would cry, how much he hated baths. There is humor and joy in each moment, even if you can't see it until it passes if you can just step back and look. I can't wait to watch you with your son. Lyndsay
30: A mom thinks about her kids even if they're not with her, a mom loves her kids in a way that they will never understand,(until they have their own) A mom will be there for her kids even when they neglect and hurt her. a mom will catch a grenade, take a bullet, stand in front of a train and ask God to take her instead of her child or grandchild. A mom loves her kids to the moon and back and more
32: Monica, Two things my mother always said to us while growing up was don't cheat, don't lie, and don't steal, and never bring shame upon the family (see the Chinese influences in those words) Parenting is never east. The hardest thing to tell your child is no. You cannot give your child everything he/she wants, because they will never appreciate anything. There are times when you get really frustrated and feel like packing your kid's bags and putting them on the front doorstep. Then your child does something really sweet and you decide to keep him for another week. :) Seriously, Mr. Sershen and I have always felt that God blessed us with our girls, and it was our responsibility to do the best that we could for them. We have learned that it does not matter how much money you make or what you can materially give them. What matters most was the time you spent with your children. Read to them every night. Play board games with them. Play outside with them. These are the gifts your children will always remember. We wish you and Brandon the best. Enjoy your little one because they grow up way too quickly. John and Theresa Sershen
33: Teach your child to take time to think things over before reacting. With all the things I did as a child growing up, that's what kept me out of any serious trouble. You're not quite as young as I was when my son was born, but you can enjoy each other and grow up together. Believe me, you will never regret it. I was truly blessed to have such a great son who turned out to be a great father also. I really like to think his mother and I had something to do with that. Good luck to all of you. There is truly nothing like the connection you will have between you and your child. Love, Uncle Cork
34: Beat your child :) Just kidding. The child is number 1 in your life for the next 20 years, mom and dad are now number 2 You are your child's number one teacher, spend time with him, play with him, teach him MANNER and RESPECT. Kids don't need materialistic things, they need your love and attention. I am sure he will have both you and Brandon. Love, Aunt Faye
35: Listen to your pediatrician, as times have changed and remedies have also improved. Get your baby all the shots he needs. I hope you have a baby that sleeps night for you. Love, Aunt Bonnie
37: I feel like Monica is so ready for this next chapter. She was so wonderful to me when Dominic was colicky, she invited me over one day and carried him around while I got a shower, relaxed on her couch, and she fed me in her home. I will never forget that day. She has a very strong and loving husband to help support her and I just know they will welcome Kristopher into this world with plenty of knowledge, understanding, and love-they've got this down
39: Tracy and Khya | Thirdly, sleep when the baby sleeps. Do it. Don't worry about the laundry, or the dishes, or whatever else has to be done-sleep. You need it because he will make you miss out on a lot and your body is healing. Remember yourself-EAT and SLEEP. Kristopher needs a strong and healthy momma. Lastly, don't let him call the shots. There are so many things that I didn't do or go to because I was afraid she would cry or it would interrupt her routine-just go. Do what you need to do, don't feel like a prisoner to his schedule. I made that mistake the first time, I didn't go to any mommy groups when I was really craving socialization, we didn't meet Daddy for lunch because I was afraid her nap would be 30 minutes later, it took me 3 weeks to get the timing just perfect so I could go to the post office. I will not do that again, the baby will sleep when he sleeps and be fine as long as he's with momma.
40: May your tears come from laughing, you find friends worth having, with every year passing they mean more than gold. Maybe you win but stay humble, smile more than grumble, and know when you stumble you're never alone
41: Don't be embarrassed to cry at the sappy songs :)
42: Call me, text me, FB me, this is the best thing I have ever done in my life and it is sooooo fun | Start the baby book now ( it's been 2 and a half years and I'm on page 3, so sad
43: I love to answer questions and hear about those crazy stories you are experiencing. I may be 1000 miles away, but I am ALWAYS available as close as you need me to be. I love you girl. SO much. And I am so proud of you.
45: We are all here for you Monica because we love you, we believe in you, and we've been there. You will be a wonderful mommy