FC: Luke | I thank my God every time I remember you. ~ Phillippians 1:3
1: In memory of our little all star | Luke Alan Graham Akey | welcomed into our lives... January 20, 2008 at 9:34 p.m. 5 lb. 4 oz. 17 in. welcomed into Heaven... February 29, 2008 at 7:15 a.m.
3: January 16, 2008 Today...I remember reading the story of Deborah this morning. For some reason, I have not forgotten. I took Isaiah to his first dental appointment. I will never forget Susan doing the "ring test" and declaring..."It's a boy!"I went for my 33 week prenatal visit in the afternoon and had an ultrasound. I remember seeing your little heart beating so fast that it looked like it was just fluttering. Something wasn't right, but I wasn't worried. They wheeled me over to the hospital. I called daddy who was supposed to be bringing your brothers to me so he could get to work. I guess he wouldn't make it to work. We had to be transferred by ambulance to St. Joes. We left Isaiah and Nathanael with Grandma and Grandpa. Your brothers cried as they took us away.....
4: Here I am, waiting for your arrival. This was the first time we had decided not to find out if you were a girl or a boy. Daddy tried to sneak a peek at your medical records once when we were on our way to a doctor's appointment! I, along with the rest of the family, could not wait to know! | January 20, 2008
5: Welcome to the World Luke Alan Graham Akey. We had decided on Luke Alan Graham if you were a boy, but had few ideas if you were a girl. We liked Abigail. Would your middle name be Anne, Grace, or maybe Jean as daddy had always wanted? In the delivery room, they said "It's a Boy!" so it didn't matter anymore. We had our Luke. We loved the name Luke, Alan, of course, comes from daddy, and Graham, from Grandpa Frank. We admit, we weren't really surprised that you were a boy since you already had two big brothers. Oh well! It was fun!
9: January 21, 2008 This was the first time, other than in the delivery room, that I was able to see you precious baby boy. I was so numb from my epidural that I couldn't walk for hours! I had to beg my nurse to take me to see you while daddy was sleeping. I was so glad I did because a few hours later, you coded, silly boy. I will never forget that phone call nor will I forget daddy and I rushing to your side. I don't think I've ever come up a flight of stairs any faster! You were purple as could be and receiving chest compressions., but I started talking to you. You opened your sweet little eyes and looked at me. It is a moment that still brings tears to my eyes, but also one that I will always cherish...seeing your sweet little eyes looking back at me, knowing mommy and daddy were right there with you. Daddy and I felt so helpless. We couldn't help you baby boy, but we loved you more than anything and were right there with you!
10: Mom and Dad | Grandma and Grandpa
11: Mom and Aunt Tracie | Aunt Tracie
12: the many faces of Luke
13: Where's Luke? | back from the cath lab | January 25, 2008 Today we found out you would need a permanent pacemaker. Dr. Rhee said you wouldn't be able to play any rough sports . How would your survive in our house with your brothers? Ha Ha! We'd rather have you with a pacemaker than not have you at all little man! Now, we just needed for you to come off of ECMO!
15: Mommy helping Dana and Emily reposition you. It always felt great to be able to help take care of you.
16: Isaiah getting to meet you. He still talks about you and loves and misses you always.
17: Taking Isaiah and Nathanael up to the top of South Mountain...a break from the hospital ~ January 26, 2008
18: January 28, 2008 You were able to come off of ECMO today! Yay Luke! We were so thankful because a small bleed had been noticed on your head ultrasound. January 29, 2008 I will never forget this day. You were able to have your CT scan today. What appeared to be a small bleed on your head ultrasound was actually a large bleed. It was one of the worst days of my life. I remember crying and telling your doctors and nurses that I just wanted to hold you. Mommy and daddy had not been able to hold you since the day you were born because of all that you had been through. :-(
19: February 3, 2008 Super Bowl XLII was played in Arizona today. I will never forget holding you in my arms and watching the big game with you little man. The New York Giants beat the previously undefeated New England Patriots 17 to 14. Daddy still hopes to one day see the Lions play in the Super Bowl. We'll see! | Super Bowl XLII
20: Spending Time With You
21: The many faces of our sweet baby boy . I loved to kiss your tiny little lips. I loved to hold your hand. You'd take my finger in yours, and would squeeze my finger with the Adenosine. I was there for you. I was there with you. my precious. I remember admiring your sweet eyes. I cried and cried when you lost your sight, my sweet baby boy. I will never forget realizing that you could no longer see us; that you could no longer see what was being done to you, who was coming toward you. What must you have thought? How scared must you have been? I love you baby and I'm so sorry. You were such a tough little guy and mommy and daddy are so thankful and grateful for the time we got to spend with you. We can't wait to see you again!
22: February 28, 2008 I hope you know how much we love you. This was probably the hardest day of our lives. We knew it was best for you. You were going to be with Jesus, but how could we say goodbye? I remember Dr. Grimaldi telling us that we could extubate you whenever we were ready. We would never be ready. You were our little man. From the moment you were born, I was so excited to have three little boys and now that dream was dying with you. You were dying. | NATHANAEL
23: OUR FAMILY Feb. 28, 2008 | You are my precious little boy, so tiny, so little, so perfect in every way... This was it, but we knew it was what we had to do. We had been praying for a miracle, but the Lord always knows best and he wanted you little man. Back to Heaven you would go... | ISAIAH
24: February 29, 2008 This is definitely a day no mother dreams of; the day you'll have to say goodbye to your sweet baby. I will never ever forget this night. I have no regrets and I have many regrets. I wish we had been able to take you for a walk outside. You never got to see the outside of the hospital, feel the wind, see the sun. I wish I had held you more. I remember holding you that night then laying you down so you and I and daddy could rest. We did not know how long you would be. I remember waking up to see your oxygen needs increasing and knowing you would not be here much longer. I remember holding you and telling daddy that it wouldn't be long. | I knew daddy didn't want to get up, he didn't want to say goodbye either. Maybe if we kept sleeping, you would stay, We could postpone the inevitable. It was so hard to hold you and not know when you would take your last breath.. I remember telling you that it was okay for you to go and be with Jesus. We did not want you to suffer any longer. I remember telling Jesus that he could take you home sweet baby boy. I whispered to you how much I loved you. I pleaded with the Lord not to take my sweet baby boy. I cried out that it just did not seem fair. I kept thinking, I cannot do this. I need to make him a full code. I cannot do this. I want him reintubated,
25: but I knew it was for the best. You were going to be with Jesus and you were going to be okay. We were going to be okay, but you were so tiny. How could you be dying? It just didn't seem right. Grandma and grandpa came to the hospital early to say goodbye. Aunt Tracie came too. It was so quiet in your room. The unthinkable was happening. Our sweet baby boy was leaving us. At 7:15, you took your final breath. I remember screaming, "my son, my son!" I could not believe you were gone. I remember holding you and knowing that the second you were no longer "in my arms," that you were in the arms of Jesus. I remember feeling so numb. | I gave you a bath and dressed you up in a new outfit. We waited with you until they came to take you away. We then went to lunch at Lucille's, a place where dad and I have yet to eat since and your daddy loves BBQ! After lunch we had to go to the funeral home to make arrangements for you. I carried your little hat with me everywhere I went. We missed you so much and we miss you so much still.Sleeping that night and for many nights was so difficult. Daddu and I would just sit, hold each other, and cry, wondering why you were gone.. I can't wait to see you again. Love, Mommy
26: Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. ~1 Corinthians 13:7 This scripture was and still is a source of comfort for me. It was also a scripture given to me on the day you were born. We hung it above your crib.
27: One last night together.....
28: G | o | o | d
29: b | y | e | for now, Baby Boy
30: Holding you in my arms and waiting for you to go home to be with Jesus. Even though you could no longer see, I know Jesus let you see us that night. I know you could hear us telling you to go and be with Jesus even though you would be missed. I was finally getting to snuggle and cuddle with my little man....XOXOXO
32: daisy: loyal love, purity, innocence, love that conquers all, associated with the 5th wedding anniversary (ironically enough, dad and I had just celebrated ours in October 2007 while pregnant with you) | And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. ~Romans 8:28
33: March 29, 2008 One month to the day after you left us, we held your memorial service. Tony, Gina, Isaac, Ezra, and Emma came from Michigan to spend the week with us. Jacob was also here to visit. Tony wrote the most wonderful song in your honor and sang it at your service. Daddy had written a poem on the night that you died. He called it "40 Days" since that was how long you were with us. He read it at your memorial service. We had people who barely knew us, if at all, help us with your service and in the time surrounding your death. We will never forget the kindness shown to us by our coworkers, our churches, and the community.
34: You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. ~Psalm 56:8 Luke, We do not know or understand why God wanted you back so soon. We love you and will always miss you. You were a precious little man and we look forward to reuniting with you one day! Sending much love now and always! Mommy
35: 40 DAYS Another precious angel, given to us to love... Sweet little angel, sent from heaven above. Another broken heart, with little time to mend... Life's new beginning, already close to end. You were so perfect in every way, Only God knows why you could not stay. The pain inside continues to grow. We miss our boy, we have yet to know. From the moment of your first cry we knew. God had a special plan for you. The many lives for you to touch, with tender care. All seeking to offer a bit of prayer. Each person on bended knees, Whispering "God heal Luke, will you please?" So much Faith and so much Hope, So much Love for our little boy. Whose very being, brought us such joy. The pain and tears have come to flow... Our love for you, we'll always know. Please don't leave us, we wish you could stay... To run, to jump, to laugh, to play. Not our will to be done... Time for you to move on. Back to heaven where you belong, WIth our memories to carry on... Your strength inspires us, Your courage amazes us, Your journey has touched our lives forever... We will always love you and miss you