S: Terminator: Sesame Street
BC: This book is dedicated to my friends, who are awesome yet ridiculous at the same time. I would also like to thank all the bands who gave me characters and inspiration. I would lastly like to thank my parents, because without them, I wouldn't know who these people were and I would be inspired to write this. by Professor Logan Thomas Kober
FC: Terminator: Sesame Street By Professor Logan Kober
1: The year is 2028. Former members of bands who have survived the Skyenet apocalypse, live on Sesame Street, or what was Sesame Street. Corey Taylor and Axl Rose patrol the streets of apocalyptic Sesame Street, where the buildings lay in ruin, the city bombed to rubble. Suddenly, they come upon the carcass of Cookie Monster, cookies and all. Axl bends down to examine the beast, when suddenly Corey yells, "RUN AXL!". A Big Bird terminator has spotted them, it opens its mechanical beak and squawks. Then, a mini gun emerges from his beak and opens fire on the men. Just when all hope seems lost, Lars Ulrich, Mike D, and Dave Mustaine come around the corner in a humvee. Axl and Corey dash for the vehicle while Dave opens fire on the Big Bird terminator, blowing a hole through his head. Big Bird drops to the ground. "Terminated" says Dave and Mike while Lars chuckles at the comment. They then ride off into the demolished ruins of Sesame Street. | The base of operations where this group resides is an underground fortress beneath the old Sesame Street studio. Upon arrival, MCA and Adrock open the trapdoor leading into the fortress and let the passengers out. In the amazingly bright garage, three more humvees lay waiting to be repaired. Adrock, MCA, and Mike D begin work on the recently used combat vehicle. While Corey and Axl proceed to the main control room, Dave and Lars head to their quarters for a good night's rest. About an hour later, while Lars, Dave, and the Beastie Boys sleep, Corey, Axl, Slash, James, Duff, and Kirk are having a discussion on when to attack the Skyenet base. "We should attack tomorrow while we have the advantage" says Slash. "Good, so it's settled, we attack the Skyenet base tomorrow near dusk" replies James. Then, Joey Jordinson blasts through the door, and yells," I'm a genius!". "Why" asks Corey, and then they see it walk through the door. Layne Staley"s reanimated corpse strolls out of the door behind Joey.
2: Everyone drops their jaws in disbelief, and Layne utters his first undead words. "Long time no see fellows". Slash and Duff then ask in unison,"Joey, how did you manage to bring the deceased singer of Alice in Chains back to life?". Joey responds with," I just used some old toxic waste that was lying around and some old parts we weren't using to reinforce his skeletal structure and allow him to move like we do.". Following Joey's description, the group starts to fill in Layne on what has happened in the 26 years since Layne died. Around 2 a.m., they finally finish and head to their quarters to join their comrades in a deep slumber in order to prepare for the battle that will take place later in the day. Around 10:30 that day, the team wakes up, has breakfast and coffee, and proceeds to the garage to determine who rides in which car. James, who is the leader of the group, picks who rides in each humvee. " Corey, Dave, Duff, and myself will take the lead vehicle and take us into battle. In the car to the left of the lead car will be Lars, MCA, Adrock, and MIke D, and finally in the car to the right of the lead car will be Joey, Axl, Slash, and Layne.". "What about Kirk?" asks Layne, and his answer is from James. "Kirk will be covering us from above with the Creeping Death.".
3: "What exactly is the Creeping Death?" asks Layne. "The Creeping Death is the ultimate aircraft, bullets just ricochet off of it on contact and it is just all around amazing!" replies James. "Excuse me James but what role does undead Mr. Staley play in this battle?" asks MCA. " Um hello, he's a zombie, he can't die thanks to the toxic waste coating his body and he is amazingly strong" says Joey with confidence. Now that the seating arrangement and the argument have been settled, the group gathers what weapons and supplies they need and pile into their vehicles. Meanwhile, Kirk prepares the Creeping Death for combat. The group exits the base, and accelerates towards Skyenet central. In the lead car, James turns on "Fuel", a once famous hit from James' old band, Metallica. "No, no, no, we are going to listen to 'Wait & Bleed'." says Corey. As the two continue their argument, Dave cuts in and says," Hey, how about some Megadeth?" and everyone in the car replies by screaming,"NO ONE CARES.".
4: "Well, Duff what should we listen to then?" asks Corey. "How about some GNR Lies." says Duff. "Fine by me" replies the group. Meanwhile, in the car to the left of the lead car, Licensed to Ill is blaring, and Lars rolls down the window and mouths,"Help me!". Finally, in the car to the right, "Rooster" is as loud as possible. At last, after several hours of driving, they finally arrive on the outskirts of the Skyenet facility. Lars and Dave exit their humvees and set up a repelling device so they can get into the facility undetected. The first group to make their way into the Skyenet base is Adrock, MCA, and Mike D. Their mission was to eliminate the Big Bird terminator manufacturing section of the Skyenet headquarters. The stealthy beat masters silently make their way to the Big Bird plant. As they open the door to the room, all the Big Bird terminators activate and face their opponents. In the midst of death, MCA says with confidence,"There's only one way to win this battle...RAP!". Then, miraculously, the beat to "Intergalactic" starts up. As they start dancing, the Big Birds can't follow the trio and start firing in random directions, killing other terminators as they do. Coincidently, as the song ends, all of the terminators lay motionless."Rust in peace robots" says Adrock. Off in the distance, Dave Mustaine laughs. As the Beastie Boys proceed to the meet up point, Dave and Layne make their way to the memory chip plant. As they walk in the room, three Bert and three Ernie terminators greet them. An Ernie drop kicks Layne, who goes sailing through the room and hits a nearby wall, which cracks and collapses on the corpse.
5: "Nooo" yells Dave, but Layne emerges from the rubble and charges the Ernie who kicked him. Ernie throws a punch but Layne deflects it and rips off the mechanical arm. Then, Layne head butts Ernie and the worm Layne has for a left eye flies throw the head of Ernie and steals the memory chip, leaving the terminator to tumble. A few feet away, Dave stands atop the bodies of three terminators with his M-16. With two terminators left, one approaches Layne who kicks the robot in the face, leaving its circuits dysfunctional. Layne then picks up the last terminator and tosses him out the window. As the two rendezvous with the Beastie Boys, the remaining seven, which are Corey, Axl, Slash, Duff, Joey, James, and Lars, make their descent into the force field generator. When they enter the room, Elmo and Big Bird terminators greet them. "How is Elmo going to hurt us?"' asks Duff, just as an Elmo tickles another Elmo......with lasers! "Great Odin's raven, that's scarier than me" comments Layne. Corey and Axl sprint through the horde of machines with their G-18's, James and Lars set up a mini gun behind some fallen terminators, while Slash, Duff, and Joey stand in the open and unload clip after clip into the terminators. Finally, the Elmos and Big Birds give in and drop their ammo into the generator, causing a massive malfunction and the generator explodes. Somehow, the resistance members survive and unite with the remaining five members in the Skyenet courtyard. As they meet up, all the remaining terminators, such as Elmo, Big Birds, and the Count, surround them.
6: Then, the leader of these terminators steps out of the darkness. "Oh....My....God...It's...." and then as a group, everyone shouts,"MICHAEL JACKSON!". "Wait a minute didn't you die in 2009?" asks Slash. "He died too?!" says Layne, shocked. " I did but after all that plastic surgery I had during my lifetime, Skyenet melted me down and gave me the body of a terminator." says MJ. Just then, the machines set their red-dot sight on the men and open fire. Luckily, the group has a metallic barrier between them and the terminators. After about a half hour, the group is running low on ammo and the odds are looking grim. Suddenly, a break in the clouds above reveal the Creeping Death! Kirk soars to the battleground and rains fire on the machines. Bullets tear the machines apart, explosions happen everywhere and the facility goes up in smoke. Kirk sets the chopper down, and the men walk heroically toward him. A Count terminator stumbles from the destruction and limps toward Slash, who takes out his laser-lined brass knuckles and smashes the terminators torso in until the red eyes go black. Another Count emerges from the field of bodies, but is deactivated instantly because Duff steps on his head. Lastly, MJ steps out from under the fallen machines and sprints towards the group. The monstrosity jumps through the air but is caught by the decayed hand of Layne Staley. Layne utters the words," I don't need bullets to kill you." and then tosses Michael into the burning facility, which explodes as MJ hits. The crew takes their seats in the Creeping Death and fly home to their subterranean base. Outside the base, a sign reads,"Battles can be won, but the enemy is sure to return for blood.". And that is exactly what would happen in the months to come, but that is an entirely different story. All I can say is that, the next battle, no one forgot.
8: The following pages contain pictures and details of the characters mentioned in this book, such as: Layne Staley Adrock MCA Mike D Corey Taylor Joey Jordison James Hetfield Kirk Hammett Lars Ulrich Dave Mustaine Slash Duff McKagan Axl W. Rose
9: Name: Corey Taylor Band: Slipknot Role: Singer Birth Date: December 8, 1973
10: Name: Michael McKagan AKA Duff McKagan Band: Guns N Roses Role: Bassist Date of Birth: February 5th, 1964
11: Name: William "Axl" Rose Band: Guns N Roses Role: Singer Date of Birth: February 6th, 1962
12: Name: Saul Hudson AKA Slash Band: Guns N Roses Role: Guitarist Date of Birth: July 23rd, 1965
13: Name: Layne Staley Band: Alice In Chains Role: Singer Date of Birth & Death: August 22nd, 1967- April 5th, 2002 Cause of Death: Overdose of Heroin
14: Name: Dave Mustaine Band: Megadeth Role: Singer/Lead Guitar Date of Birth: September 13th, 1961
15: Name: Adam Yauch AKA MCA Band: Beastie Boys Role: Singer Date of Birth: August 4th, 1964
16: Name: Adam Horovitz AKA Adrock Band: Beastie Boys Role: Singer Date of Birth: October 31, 1966
17: Name: Michael Diamond AKA Mike D Band: Beastie Boys Role: Singer Date of Birth: November 20th, 1965
18: Name: James Hetfield Band: Metallica Role: Singer/Rhythm Guitar Date of Birth: August 3rd, 1963
19: Name: Kirk Hammett Band: Metallica Role: Lead Guitarist Date of Birth: November 18th, 1962
20: Name: Lars Ulrich Band: Metallica Role: Drums Date of Birth: December 26th, 1963
21: Name: Nathan "Joey" Jordison Band: Slipknot Role: Drums Date of Birth: April 26th, 1975