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New York

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S: New York 2010

1: It all started at 6 am June 10th when Lydia was ditched by her travel companion only to be fondled by a large woman at the airport who claimed to be doing random security checks. It was then that we knew this was going to be a journey to be remembered! We arrived at the airport with a spring in our step which soon turned into a bit of a shuffle after Brenda gave a suspicious man a stern "No" accompanied by a death glare in response to his asking if we needed a ride. Lydia knew she was in good hands! We arrived at our home away from home, "Hotel St. James." Our room was quite luxurious with a bed fit for two queens and a TV you would only see on MTV's "Cribs." We immediately headed out to explore NYC. We walked to Central Park where Pavel summoned us to a bike taxi around Central Park. After making sure WE would not be pedaling ourselves, we gladly took the offer. It only took five minutes for Pavel to secretly wish he hadn't picked us up as he was out of breath with forty-five minutes yet to go. After exploring Central Park and taking a rainy ferry to see the Statue of Liberty (from miles away), we realized it was time to go home to St. James and get ready to go see Promises, Promises. The play was hilarious but Lydia could have done without the audience member three seats ahead that was hacking up a lung. After the show, we headed out to find a bar with outdoor seating. Apparently this is unheard of in NYC, but this was the night we found the best kept secret from most tourists: The Perfect Pint. After a few too many night caps, we headed home feeling like we had done a weeks worth of activities in one day!

2: We showed our true tourist side on the 11th as we hit all the hotspots. First we went downtown to see the World Trade Memorial site then followed up by walking to Chinatown and Little Italy. After which, we decided to stop by a local Chinese "Spa" where Lydia tried her hardest to make jokes with the women that clearly spoke no English what-so-ever. We originally thought we would just buy the "ten for ten deal" (ten minute foot massage for $10 dollars). However, we could not resist when our masseuses asked "you wan thirty minute?" It was by far the best investment we made the whole vacation! We hit Bryant Park and the Rockefeller Center later that day, but believe it or not, we ended up at...drum roll please...The Perfect Pint. The evening was mainly spent pissing people off. First we met Mitch the Pilot who had to fly a plane at 8am the next morning, but found it necessary to get drunk off Guinness less than twelve hours before he was scheduled to depart for Atlanta. He told us a story about hamsters that will never be forgotten. He left in a hurry, though, after Brenda told the group next to us that his flight was early the next morning. Oops! Meanwhile, Brenda said "eh" to a couple Canadians that found it completely offensive and would not speak to us the rest of the evening. We definitely were cultured in may ways on this vacation. Never say "eh" to a Canadian again! June 12th started off a bit slow as neither of us remember entering our hotel the prior evening, but that is neither here nor there as we eventually made it in time to see the Sex and The City Tour! The tour was a blast, but we could not help but be

3: curious about a lesbian couple that appeared to be mother and daughter. After the tour, we did some shopping at H&M, and then bought hotdogs from a street vendor and headed to Bryant Park which clearly needs someone or something to take control of the bird population. Our final evening in NYC was spent, oddly enough, at The Perfect Pint. This may have been the most interesting of nights as we met Art and Miles, two of the most interesting chaps we met on this vacation. Art was a Russian that had a few too many, and Miles as an English man that was set on teaching us to say "Hah-ree Pah-tuh." Art was kicked out of the bar for claiming that he was going to throw glass over the balcony. Because we were associated with these fellows, the bartender was happy to see us go as well. That didn't stop us! We went next door for a beer or two that we made Art buy us. We thoroughly enjoyed our time until Miles, a married man himself, told Brenda he wanted to marry her and offered to take showers with us. "No thanks, goodnight!" Finally our trip has come to an end, and it was time to say goodbye to St. James, NYC, and most importantly, The Perfect Pint. We were still intoxicated, which may have caused some if not all of the following: Brenda spilled water all over herself when the cab driver took off full speed from a stoplight, Brenda almost fell in a puddle at the airport, we stalked Auntie Anne's Pretzels until they opened only to decide against getting any food at all. Finally, we arrived in Chicago with some of the BEST memories, and a yearning to go back as soon as possible!

4: THE BIG APPLE | Times Square is at the junction of Broadway and 7th Avenue and stretches from West 42nd to West 47th streets.

5: "The Crossroads of the World"

6: Central Park

7: Central Park is 843 acres large and located in the center of Manhattan. The park boasts several lakes, theaters, ice rinks, fountains, baseball fields and playgrounds.

8: Statue of Liberty | For the many immigrants that flocked from Europe to New York, the Statue of Liberty was the first image they saw of the USA. The statue was a gift from the French government for the 100th birthday of America's Independence.

9: Staten Island Ferry is a passenger service operated by the New York City Department of Transportation. The ferry is one of the biggest bargains in New York City because it is FREE!!!

10: Promises, Promises tells the story of Chuck Baxter, a charming young employee at the Consolidated Life Insurance Company. In an effort to advance at the company, Chuck lends executives his apartment for their extramarital romantic trysts. But things become slightly complicated when Fran Kubelik, the object of Chuck's affection, becomes the mistress of one of his executives. Adapted from the classic Billy Wilder comedy The Apartment by Broadway luminary Neil Simon and balladeer Burt Bacharach, this revival stars Sean Hayes and Kristin Chenoweth.

12: The World Trade Center site is currently being rebuilt with six new skyscrapers and a memorial to the casualties of the attacks. | The World Trade Center was a complex of seven buildings in Lower Manhattan that were destroyed in the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks. The complex was located in the heart of New York City's downtown financial district and contained 13.4 million square feet of office space.

14: Since 1972, Hotel St. James has remained a classic staple of New York City's Times Square. Housed in a beautiful, twelve story, pre-war tower, Hotel St. James offers what other hotels in the area cant; space and comfort at affordable rates. | We dropped a lot of money and have a lot of good memories all because of The Perfect Pint!!!

18: S E X A N D T H E C I T Y T O U R

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  • By: Brenda P.
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