S: Grandpa's Family
FC: Grandpa's Family
1: Grandpa's Family by Jadis Blurton with help from (and thanks to) Sanford Martin Ullman
2: This is an album about Grandpa's family. I have fixed up some of the pictures from the family albums. I still have the originals as scanned, and I also have printable copies of the fixed-up pictures if anyone wants one. Some of the actual photos were burned in the fire in Grandpa's house. The person who is writing this is me: Aunt Elizabeth, Jadis, Lala, Mom, Grandma or hey you, depending on who wants ta know. The Grandpa in question is my father, Sanford Martin Ullman, who is one of the most remarkable men I've ever known.
3: I've asked Grandpa to write a little bit about each of the characters in the album (in blue italic), and I've added what I know from past stories. Unfortunately, I never met any of these people, except Emily once. The album is about the family of Max and Sylvia Ullman, and their three children: Sanford Martin (a.k.a.Grandpa or Sandy or Daddy), Emily and June. In the picture on the cover, Emily is the blond in front and June is the brunette in the middle and Grandpa, of course, is the gorgeous young boy on the far left. Emily was four and a half years younger than Grandpa, and June was six years younger.
4: The First Generation Pictured... This is Grandpa's Great-grandfather, Opa Brandstetter. (No, Opa is not his name. Opa means "Grandpa". We don't know his name. Your Opa just called him Opa.) This is my great-great Grandfather and, if you are in the next generation down, your great-great-great grand-father. (If you are Alex, Aaron, Aiden, Lillie, Joshua or of their generation, he's your great-great-great-great grandfather.)
5: This is the man who converted to Judaism at the age of 36 in order to marry a beautiful Jewish girl. Your grandfather describes him as a crusty old Prussian. He did not speak English and he remained antisemitic throughout his life, despite having become Jewish. Grandpa says: "Opa lived in Germany (Prussia) all of his life, until his wife died and he was flat broke. My grandparents brought him here, where he lived unhappily among 'diese verdamte Juden' until he died, somewhere in the early 1920's." We don't have a picture of his wife, which is too bad. It is interesting that his daughter, Anna, remained a practicing Jew and married a Jewish man, despite her father's attitudes and the pressures of the time. His wife must have been pretty powerful, not just beautiful.
6: This is a good place to make a note about the name Brandstetter, which means "Brand's Daughter". Such a name, (instead of something that ends in "son" like Johnson), indicates that somewhere along the line there was a Morganatic marriage and the name came down from a female, not a male. The family story is that one of the Hohenstoeffen Kings of Bavaria was married by Morganatic marriage to a commoner. Such a marriage would mean that the children could not inherit and could not take the Hohenstoeffen name. Grandma used to say that she didn't believe the story until she and her husband (your grandfather) were travelling in Europe and visited the castle of Mad King Ludwig of Bavaria... she looked up on the wall and, she claims, all the pictures looked just like Max!
7: Opa's Daughter Opa's daughter was named Anna Brandstetter. She married a man named Isadore Ullman and she was your grandfather's grandmother on his father's side. We don't have a picture of Isadore Ullman. The little boy in this picture is Grandpa's favorite cousin, Danny, who was the son of Grandpa's favorite uncle, George.
8: Your Grandfather says: "Isador Ullman was born in Budapest, Hungary. He vigorously denied being Hungarian - though by citizenship, he was. 'Tne Chermans lived in Buda -my city. The Hunkies lived across the rifer, in Pest,' he used to say. Of course, this was all part of the Austria-Hungary Empire - the Hapsburg Empire- when he was born, sometime in the mid-19th Century. My grandmother, Anna Brandstetter, was born in Prussia about the same time - I think in Frankfurt an der Oder. To the best of my knowledge, they both emigrated to the United States and met and married here. So both were more-or-less German (though Hitler would not have agreed with that) and they spoke German in their own home. Grandpa Isador Ullman was tailor to the most elite New Yorkers, and had an office and showroom on Fifth Avenue - and always spoke with a very gutteral German accent. Grandma Anna Bronstetter Ullman spoke perfect English - except
9: when she was upset or angry, at which point her v's became f's and her w's became v's. They had four sons - Albert, Maxwell Leonard, Leo and Samuel (who later evolved into George). All four boys were highly successful, all of them (except my father, dammit) becoming millionaires at some point in their lives. My father missed it by only a few days in October 1929, but miss it he did! None of the others except baby brother Leo managed to hold onto it for their entire lifetimes, however, but Leo died in 1966 worth a whole $8,000,000. He generously left me $2,500 in his will - which, I may add, I sorely needed at the time." Grandpa always told us that his grandfather Ullman used to insist on only German at home, saying "All day long I speak that harsh lengvitch, Englitch. At night, in my own home, ve speak the lengvitch of the poets -Cherman!"
10: Young Maxwell Leonard Ullman Max Ullman was the son of Anna Brandstetter and Isadore Ullman. He grew up in New York, of course, and married his childhood sweetheart...
11: Sylvia Greenstein Sylvia and Max were apparently an item from early childhood on. They always knew they would be married, according to your grandfather.
12: Sylvia's Mother
13: Sylvia was the daughter of Anna Oppenheim and Isadore Greenstein. We don't have a picture of Isadore Greenstein either. This is a picture of Anna Oppenheim and Sanford Ullman when he was, obviously, very little. My father writes: "I can't recall my mother ever telling me anything about them, so all I can do is rely a bit on what my cousin Melvin told me, and that isn't very much. Apparently, Isadore Greenstein came from Lithuania, an Orthodox Jew (and a very, very good man). He owned a grocery store, and it was open all day every Saturday 'because that's the only day the Catholics have to shop, and they have to eat, too.' Since this was his Sabbath day, it took quite a bit of rationalizing. He did not take money, but had them write their debts in a book. He also sold a lot of stuff on credit - and when he died, all debts were wiped off the books. (I might add that his son, the doctor, did the same thing.)
14: Anna Oppenheimer -or, perhaps, Oppenheim - was quite different. She came from Frankfurt-am-Main (I think) from a not-very-observant and very wealthy family, She had three sisters, each about one year apart. Being a teenager, or perhaps 20 or 21, she got an odd idea into her head - she would go to New York and visit her uncle, then head of the Oppenheim-Collins department store. (It's still thriving on Fifth Avenue in Manhattan). Her sisters, all in their late teens, clamored to go with her - and all set off for the States - where they found their uncle adamantly refusing to see them. And their parents also refused to take them back! What they had done was unheard of in the 19th century, and considered highly immoral. You know the rest of the story, I believe - how the four Greenstein brothers married the four Oppenheim sisters on the same day and with the same ceremony! If not, let me know and I'll flesh it out a bit more for you. But remember, this is all hearsay, from Melvin. My 'little' grandma was a very sweet old lady, no more
15: than 5 feet tall, and quite old - older than my other grandparents. And he was a very kindly, gentle old man - but, of course, I don't remember them very well, since they both died when I was about 6, and both within a week of each other!" By the way, I do remember the story. Anna met Isadore and they fell in love. But when Isadore asked Anna to marry him, she had to turn him down. She told him she couldn't marry him because she had three younger sisters and had to be responsible for them until they were married. He beamed and said, "That's no problem! I have three brothers!" So, the story goes, all four couples were married together in the same ceremony. It is difficult to imagine what it must have been like for a rich, probably somewhat spoiled young lady arriving from Germany and being refused by her family, alone in New York City and responsible for three siblings. She must have been terrified, hardworking, and ultimately pretty lucky.
16: Young Sylvia Greenstein We know that she must have been very smart - we have the award that she won (first place) in the New York Times Centennial writing contest when she was only about twelve years old.
17: Grandpa writes: "I'm sure you remember my story about when she cut her hair? She had very beautiful brown hair that fell below her waist - as you can see in the picture. That huge bun at the back of her head is all real hair, no fake! Anyway, she held out until 1921. By that time almost every other woman in the world had had their hair bobbed, so finally she succumbed - she cut her hair, and when I saw her I really went ape! I crawled under the piano in our living room, crying my eyes out, and didn't come out for three days, or so they tell me. I must have come out - or maybe sneaked out - to go to the bathroom from time to time, but I have no memory of that - all I can remember, to this day, is being under that piano for what seemed forever. Totally broken-hearted. My mother had cut her glorious hair! I can still remember how beautiful it was."
18: Max as a Dad Sylvia may have been sweet, but Max was not, according to his son. Grandpa describes him as very authoritarian and demanding in his home, and difficult to live with, although he could also be very charming.
19: Grandpa writes: "He was a highly sentimental man, and I never doubted that he loved my mother - but he could also be both loud-mouthed and foul-mouthed and terribly abusive verbally. As far as I know, he never abused her physically - but I do remember being heartily spanked numerous times, either with a hair-brush (bristle side down) or with his belt! Though I loved my mother dearly, I had to escape this - and I left home at 16, and never turned back." But he could sometimes be fun, too. Grandpa tells a story about when they first got a car - and Grandpa was only about ten years old. (Maybe it was the winter after this picture was taken.) Cars were new things, so nobody had a driver's license. They just went down to the dealer, bought the car, and drove it off the lot... having never driven one before. They bought the car in the winter and drove it home in the snow. When they got home, they had to drive it down the hill to their house. So Max drove down the hill, slammed on the brakes, and the car did a 180 degree skid! Max lit up, turned to his son, and said, "Hey! I didn't know it would do THAT!" So he drove back up the street, and they did it again. An alternative use of the car as sled!
21: Grandpa writes: "He was a fairly tall (6 ft.), heavy-set, extremely handsome man. Max was a highly intelligent, well-educated (though he never went to college) and very successful advertising man. He made very good money, but he also gambled a lot of it away, which meant that the family was perpetually on a financial roller-coaster... Max was born in 1891, grew up on New York's East Side. He went to grammar school and high school there, though I do doubt that he ever graduated from high school. He read a lot, and being very intelligent, he read well - which meant that he really was a well-educated man." Max died in 1955, in March. If you do the math, you'll see that he was only 64 when he died. His son (Grandpa) was under orders to go to France but was able to visit his father in the hospital in Los Angeles before he left. Max died just a few days later.
23: One of the stories Grandma always told about Max is that when Sylvia died Max was seriously unable to take care of himself. He had never done laundry or cooked or done anything domestic, so he seemed lost about even simple things. In fact, she said he called her to find out how to get his shirts clean because he "couldn't afford to keep buying new ones." She may have been exaggerating, but I think it's safe to say he had pretty clear gender-role distinctions.
24: Grandpa writes: "Okay - Sylvia. Born in 1891, she died in 1951 - just 60 years old.
25: That's a pretty long time ago, and my memory of her is vivid in spots, but is largely snapshots more or less. She was a pretty woman, as you can see from the pictures, and quite small - 5'2" in heels! I know that she met my father when they were both in grammar school, loved him then and loved him when she died. She was not necessarily happy with him - in fact, she was often quite unhappy - but she stuck with him through richer and poorer - and she had both of those a number of times. She was a wonderful seamstress - and you know, I've just had a memory that goes back further than the return of the 26th Division in 1919! I just remembered sitting on the curb in front of our apartment house on Washington Heights, with my broken kiddy-car next to me. I couldn't have been more than three. Anyhow, a passerby stopped and commisserated with me . 'Oh, it's too bad your toy is broken,' she said. And I remember looking up at her with a broad smile and saying, 'It's okay - my mother will sew it!'"
26: "She was a highly intelligent and well-read woman. She always encouraged me in my school work, and I hated to make her unhappy whenever I fell below an A, which wasn't often - though, of course, being human, I sometimes hit a B or a B+. To tell the truth, she even was somewhat distraught if I got an A-! Anyhow, she diligently helped me with my homework - never doing any of it herself, mind you - she used the Socratic method to get me to get it right myself. So I graduated grammar school when I was 12. A wise woman as well as a smart one!"
27: truth, she even was somewhat distraught if I got an A-! Anyhow, she diligently helped me with my homework - never doing any of it herself, mind you - she used the Socratic method to get me to get it right myself. So I graduated grammar school when I was 12. A wise woman as well as a smart one! "I was a very busy boy in high school - newspaper, football, swimming, cross-country, boy scouts, math club - and, of course, GIRLS - so that I have a very dim memory of my mother during those years. And, of course, I left home when I was 16. I did go back two years later, when my father went broke again and I had to leave college. I had a job, worked days, and my nights (being 18) were wrapped up in wine, women and song! But I have the dearest memory of a sweet, smart, caring - and long-suffering - woman whom I loved very much."
28: Max and Sylvia's first child was Sanford Martin Ullman. (He didn't become Grandpa until much later.) He was born on April 1st, 1915. He was three years old in the picture on the right. It's no wonder that Jewish grandmothers are famous for squeezing cheeks.... I mean, just look at them!
30: Grandpa grew up in New York City, except for a short stint in Chicago during his primary school years. His family was Jewish, but fairly liberal in practice. He was five years old in this picture, so it was taken in about 1920.
31: The Wunderkind... He was about twelve years old in this one. He skipped several half-grades in school. When he graduated from high school, having just turned 16, he took Honors in English, Math and Science. In fact, he had a record in Math that nobody could beat: He scored 100% on all the math exams administered by the New York State Board of Regents
32: Grandpa writes: "I sold Saturday Evening Posts from the time I was about eleven, and made just a few bucks a week. However, I must have been selling more than most, because the New York distributors of the Post came along and offered me the job of distributor in Far Rockaway. This was a real tough job! First of all, they delivered the magazines to me, I think, on Wednesday afternoon, and on Thursday afternoon the kids came along to pick up the number of copies they thought they could sell. Since I had recruited almost my whole Scout troop to sell for me, there were a lot of kids and I had to work a whole two hours, more or less! The Post wasn't officially issued until Friday, and that's when the kids went out and sold them. On Saturday morning, they'd return any they hadn't sold, and I had the awful chore of tearing off the covers and returning those covers to the NY distributor for credit. Another two hours, more or less. Incidentally, we also sold the
33: Ladies Home Journal and the Country Gentleman - heavy on the first, light on the second - but the Journal was a good seller, and quite profitable. My total take for all those hours of back-breaking labor was $30 a week! This was in 1927 through 1930. If you figure that out in today's dollars, $30 a week is about $450 a week today. That's beginning to approach the hourly pay of a Ph.D. Psychologist. Not quite, but I was only 12." My favorite story about this time is that he finally decided to see what it was like to get in trouble. He was the Hall Monitor (of course), and bells went off at his school to signal changes of classes . He walked in past the secretaries, waved, and reset the clocks to go off at the wrong times. Chaos reigned! He did this several times, but he never got in trouble, even though they watched him do it! He had a reputation for being such a good kid, it never occurred to them that he was creating the problem He finally gave up the notion.
34: Do you think he actually liked the game, or did he just know how good he looked in the uniform?
35: Grandpa writes: "Football? I played tackle and end. The end is a pass-receiver, and I was terrible at that! So, generally, I played tackle - in those days both offensive and defensive - under the old rules if you were taken out at any time during a half, you could not return to the game during that half. I weighed a total of about 135 pounds, and generally the opposing player would outweigh me by 50 pounds or more! I loved playing football though, despite the inevitable battering I took, and you can imagine my chagrin when I tried to go out for football in college and they wouldn't even let me try out! Verdict: 'You're much too light and your nose is too big and your feet are too small.' End of that chapter."
36: What can I say... | Sanford Ullman was the youngest Eagle Scout in the United States...
37: ...achieving that rank on the day he met the age qualification. As an Eagle Scout, he had a number of experiences that most boys can only dream of. For example, he served on a standing committee with Franklin D. Roosevelt, who was at that time Governor of New York and later President of the United States. He was a camp counselor and at one point was the "snake expert" at the local camp, where he had over 200 snakes - many of them very poisonous! When Admiral Richard E. Byrd went to Antarctica, he wanted to take one Eagle Scout along. Sanford was one of the finalists, but the Scouts (and his mother) decided he was too young to go, as he was only 15, so they chose an 18 year old named Paul Siple instead. (Young Siple accompanied Dr. Byrd and later became a famous explorer himself.)
38: Your grandfather holds the record as the longest-qualifying member of the National Press Club... not because he is the oldest, but because he was the actual editor of a real newspaper when he was only fifteen. He writes: "Newspaper? That was weird. I was the proud editor-in-chief of my school newspaper, and every Thursday afternoon I would go down to the print shop, correct the copy as the galleys came from the linotypers, write all the headlines, and dummy it. This same printshop also published a newspaper called the Rockaway News. Well, the owner-editor was taken extremely ill - hospitalized - and he, sick as he was, decided I was the guy he wanted to put out the paper! Fifty bucks a week, work two afternoons after school, and usually a full day on the weekend - and, at the age of 15, I was the editor and publisher of a newspaper duly listed in Standard Rate and Data. The newspaper was a weekly, with a circulation of about 5,000."
39: (Incidentally, he continued to be the editor of his school newspaper at the same time.) Grandpa went to the University of Virginia (one of the top ten universities in the United States at that time) at the ripe old age of 16.
40: Remember the little boy with Grandma Brandstetter earlier in this book? The one I said was Grandpa's favorite cousin, Danny? He is the young man on the right, and Grandpa is the young man on the left. The man in the middle is George, Danny's father and Max's brother.
41: This is a picture of Uncle George with the man Grandpa knew as "Uncle Wudy" (Rudolf Valentino). George was his manager. Grandpa writes: | "By the time Valentino died, suddenly of peritonitis, George had already amassed quite a fortune. But he had invested it in the Bank of Italy, which went belly-up. George went on to become an actor's agent, and did very well. He represented character actors, many of them the best known in Hollywood, like Jimmy Gleason and J. Farrel McDonald. I might add that, as far as I know, George was the best-liked agent in Hollywood."
42: Emily, Grandpa's Sister Grandpa writes: "Despite the lousy pictures you got, she really was an outstandingly pretty girl. She had a great shape, natural blonde hair, green eyes, and a really flawless complexion. On the other hand, she was totally self- centered. She was four and a half years younger than I. Since I left home when I was sixteen, I hardly knew her either as a teenager or as an adult."
43: (Anonymous from The Cupid, 1736) Custom, Alas! Doth partial prove, Nor gives us even measure! To maids it is a pain to love, But 'tis to men a pleasure. They freely can their thoughts explain, Whilst ours must burn within: We have got eyes and tongues in vain, And truth from us is sin. Men to new joys and conquests fly, And yet no hazard run. Poor we are left if we deny; Or if we yield, undone. Then equal laws let custom find, Nor either sex opress: More freedom give to womankind, Or give to mankind less. Here's to you, Aunt Emily! Hope you had fun!
44: Only the Officer's Club Will Do...
45: Grandpa writes: "Tell you a story, and I'll try to condense it as best I can: When I first got in the Army, I got into a show that a bunch of guys were putting together. You may remember that drama was one of my minors in college? Anyway, I was really low man on the totem pole there - all the rest of the guys were Broadway stars, or at least medium-level movie or radio stars. Some of them became quite famous later on, because the entire cast went on to appear in a show called 'This is the Army' which travelled all over the world putting on this show for the troops and after the war it went to Broadway. Bit hit! Anyway, four years later, the show went to Tinian, where I was then stationed. One of the guys named Ross Elliot (later a rather well-known name in Hollywood) came over to me and said, 'I hate your guts.' I looked at him pretty much amazed and said, 'What did I ever do to you, Ross?' His response: 'You introduced me to your sister!'
46: This was Ross's sad story: They were putting on the show in Melbourne, Australia - and Ross, walking down the street, saw this 'little cute blonde' walking toward him. Emily, in the flesh! They recognized each other, got to talking, and Ross asked her for a date. The response was typical Emily: 'I'd love to go out with you, Ross, but the only place worth going to in Melbourne is the Officer's Club - and you're not an officer!' Ross thought for a second and then said, 'I'm a Captain in the second act, and I have the uniform in my locker! I'll take you to the club.' And he did. And they had dinner. And he went to the bar to get drinks. There came a tap on his shoulder, and a fairly familiar voice said, 'How are you, Captain Elliot?' He turned around and found himself nose to nose with his company commander! Well, they busted him two grades and levied a hefty fine on him. 'I hate your guts,' said Ross Elliot. I could hardly blame him."
47: This is Emily and her second husband "Rody" Rodebaugh and their older son, Keith. This boy, whom I've never met, is my first cousin! Grandpa writes: "The last time I saw her she | was on her third marriage - could be more by now - and she had two sons by her second husband. Her first spouse was Lou Heyman - a kid I'd known since grammar school and VERY rich. But she divorced him, joined the wartime Red Cross, and moved to Australia, where she met Dave Rodebaugh. When we came back from Japan in 1954, she was married to a guy by the name of Childs. She always lived well, did Emily."
48: The Younger Sister, June
49: Grandpa writes: "She was, I think, born in 1921 - 6 years younger than I. She was a lovely, lovely child and an equally lovely adult - though I barely knew her as an adult. Almost the last time I ever saw her was when she showed me your mother's picture and letter - at the time, I was 28 and she was 23. You know what happened after that - one of the results was you! She married a guy by the name of Bob Sawyer (whom I thoroughly disliked) and they had two kids, Rennie and Bobby (female-type Bobby)."
50: "June Sawyer and Doris Crooks lived in adjoining bungalows in California. Subsequently, Doris disposed of the Crooks (happily for me - and, of course, for you). Sadly, June retained the Sawyer!
51: Oh well. But that's how they knew each other. Some really weird things really do turn out for the best. Kismet, I guess. Or God's plan, as some would say." For those of you who don't know, Robert Crooks was Grandma's first husband, to whom she was married for a very short time. (Maybe only long enough to meet June!) Of course, my first reaction to what Grandpa wrote above was "Who the heck was Doris Crooks?" Took me a minute to figure it out. And so, the story goes, young Sanford came home from the Army on leave and, exhausted from his revels, he said to his youngest sister, "You have to look for a wife for me!" "No problem," she replied. "I've already found her..."
53: She showed her brother this picture of her (now divorced) friend, Doris, who was a Marine by this time. Grandpa looked at the picture and said, "Forget it. Nobody who looks like this could be very bright." So she showed him a letter that Grandma had written to Rennie, June's newborn baby, welcoming her to the world. Her brother looked at the picture, looked at the letter, looked at the picture, re-read the letter, and said, "I'll marry the girl." He wrote to her. She wrote back. They wrote each other for a few months and met for the first time over a spaghetti dinner on Thanksgiving, 1943. The next time they saw each other was at their wedding, two weeks later, on December 9th. (To which, I should add, Grandma was accidentally a day late!) I figure this story proves that Grandpa was right in his first assessment. I mean, anybody who was very bright would know better, right?
54: Shortly after their marriage, Grandpa took his new bride home to meet the family, including of course their new niece, Rennie. The man on the right is not Rennie's father, but a family friend - Bob Mansfield.
55: It is sad to look at a picture of baby Rennie, because she and her sister did not have happy lives. Their mother died when they were very young, and they were raised by their father. There was a period when they lived with us, during their teens, and Grandma and Grandpa wanted to retain custody because it was clear that they were already having psychological problems. In fact, Grandma thought that they had paranoid delusions. But their father came to get them and there was no legal way that Grandma and Grandpa could keep them. Grandpa writes: "Rennie is a tragic case. She killed a woman in a fit of anger - broke a flower pot over her head - and was judged unfit to stand trial because of mental instability. They put her in the California Institute for the Criminally Insane, and to the best of my knowledge she is still there. As to Bobby, I lost track of her after 1960."
56: Grandpa writes: "June and Bob had a real tough go of it, financially, up until 1954 which is when she died, tragically, of bone cancer in her left leg. I loved June, devotedly."
57: The family story is that Bob Sawyer, who was Jewish, was one of the first photographers into Dachau and took the pictures of the concentration camp as it was liberated, including the famous picture of a little child's shoe on top of a pile of clothes. After these experiences, he was seriously paranoid. (And Grandpa thinks he was none too stable before these experiences!) Rennie was only about eleven years old when her mother died.
58: The picture that clinched the deal...
59: Before they met, Grandpa sent Grandma a picture that was another in this series. I think I'm being fairly objective, and as articulate as possible, when I say about the guy in the middle..."Hubba hubba!" Grandpa writes: "As I recall, the picture I sent your mother was one of the same series, but I stood alone against a palm tree. The picture was taken from a low angle and it made me look about as tall as the Empire State Building - and, of course, very hairy! I really was pretty muscular in those days - you've got to remember that I had been pretty much of an athlete at one time as well as, I say modestly, a brain. I played football, swam long-distance, ran cross-country, and I even trained for and tried out for gymnastics, although I never was very much of a whiz at that."
60: And the rest is history... and a different book.
61: Grandma and Grandpa were married for 58 years, 7 months and 2 weeks... until Grandma died in July of 2002. They travelled the world, had children, had grandchildren, had great grandchildren, had adventures, read books, argued about politics, worked on Capital Hill, wrote speeches, worked at NASA, helped people, took risks, laughed a lot, and generally loved life. For myself, if I ever wanted a definition of success, I never had to look beyond my own home. She is gone from the back cover, but very much forever part of the family that they created... as is he.