S: Becky and Atom's Happy Funtimes Picture Book
BC: Becky and Atom's Happy Funtimes Picture Book by Becky 'n' Atom for RollyPolio Portfolio Publishers copyright Rebecca D. Watson, 2014
FC: Songs | Pictures | Poems | Becky 'n' Atom's Happy Funtimes Picture Book
1: Hello to Atom and Mommy's book of songs, poems and pictures! I seeing you peek! I telling Mommy you here and we getting started. OK you turning page now.
2: Mommy say book dedikated to whoever getting to end of sentence to see big SURPRISE. | (???Where surprise? I not seeing big surprise. It all just words. This bogus.)
3: Now I with Daddy, and Daddy say dedikate book to all Atom family 'n' friens who love Atom. and feed him. | Yeas. I sell you my frienship for cheezburger-my heart big, but my tummy jus' a liddle bid bigger!!! | (I add dat last part cuz I culd haz cheezburger now if you want earn place in dedikation).
4: See? I run with big boys. Dey call me Dawg.
5: Wait, I get comfy. Okay. Now we doing POEMS.
6: A pup is my buddy. Together, we investigate A sweet dream. | Remember morning gambol, Leap through water For beautiful toy animal? | No fetch ball. I hungry. Could eat leg. | Heel biter. | Canine chase nose Around yard. | Bark loud, Best friend. Yap and howl; Never whine. | Where he at? She know! See bed.
7: I keep clothes warm. You want get dressed? Sorry. | This my bed right now.
8: Talk to me, little puppy, Of poop, pee, sleep, food, And walking to the park, And everything in between. | Run squirrel, Show butt! | Good boy, Cleans bowl, Wags tail, Cuddly, cute, Faithful, brown. I love you. | Stick paw in ear and sniff. | Big dog growl; About a pound Of hound. | Who play? Pet my fur! | Wet mutt nuzzles girl. Dirty pals.
9: Mommy and me in Candler Park NAMIWalkies, Oct 2011 (Beleef me, der were way too many ballooms at dis event. And feet.. Waaaaaaaay too many feet.)
10: Stay there, Bad kat, No nice. | ODE TO KATZ | (I put some dose ballooms to work...) | ..
11: Okay, poems done. Dis book so big Mommy break back carrying to you! But it ok. I think Mommy inshurance cover dat. | Now we do: SONGS.
12: Stop Eatin' So Much Meat'n When you have a big poo, That won't come out of you, That's when you have The hiney cork blues. The thing about a hiney cork, It starts upon your dinner fork, With what you eat. Do you eat a lot of meat? Do you get your fluids Eight times a day? Hydration helps keep Those hiney corks away. The hiney cork blues, they ain't so great, And once you eliminate That paperweight, Don't get too excited That your poo has passed, That hiney cork Won't be your last. It ain't over Till the final gasp, When your last act Will be to take a crap! | Party Animal I want to drive around town, With my underwear down, I wanna make a scene In my limousine, I wanna be the jerk celebrity In every People magazine. But I'll never get there, I walk everywhere, I don't own a single Pair of underwear, And I ain't known by anyone, Anywhere!
13: Sad chiweenie, wanting eat candy, not wearing it. | Yum, Yum, Yammie Little sprouts of orange wash, our pups are veggies, yam and squash. Atom wears his yam so well, and Blondie sports a pumpkin shell. When little yam and pumpkin play, we love to watch all everyday! | Fun with Poodles I want to doodle-doo with your poodle-oo, I want to noodle with your poodle. A posse of poodles is oodles of fun, poodles are like little jewels.
14: Of Trust and Testicles Mama took my testicles, Had them frozen crymogenically, In case I ever wanted any Atom-ical progeny. Some say I'm naive to believe That their freezed, But Mama's got no reason To lie to me. Though she did trick me Into that bath last week... And when she threw that tennis ball, And I turned around and saw it still in her paw, I admit, i wondered if, My balls had gone off a cliff. I'd have been upset except for, At the time I didn't know What my testicles were for anyway, They probably would have just wasted away. And I never wanted any little girls or boys, To run around the house with their squeaky toys, And compete with me for treats to eat, It's okay, I never wanted kids anyway. What's that you say? Testicles are good for other things? Well, whatever they are, they can't be that great, Or Mama wouldn't have taken my testicles away!
15: Mommy, what this SCRABBLE thing? It not taste good for eating... it not fun to chase...it c'nt hide my sausages... | C'n I poop on it? Oh. How you spell that? N-O-? I not think I know that word...
16: Sunny Side Up We love Mr. Plant and Bamboola, Jubilee, Uhura and Uvula. Plants sit all day and soak up sun, I wonder if they're having fun. They live beside us in our home instead of chairs they sit in loam. When it's time to rest their heads, they sleep in little flower beds. What do little plants think? Do they have some thoughts in there? I don't know where their brains might be, for they have leaves instead of hair. Plants, plants, They don't wear pants, They clothe themselves in greenery to give the world some scenery. One thing's for certain, Plants will be our friends to the end. They drink up carbon dioxide, and manufacture all our oxygen. You can see The reasons why We love Mr. Plant and Bamboola, Jubilee, Uhura and Uvula! | Ms. Bamboola, We love yoola!
17: Quiet, Diet! I didn't know my food bowl couldn't talk to me. I'd heard it say "Hello!" so plainly. But Momma said, "No, you're deaf, my dear... It's only the rumblins in your tummy That you hear!" | No more cheezburgers left? Too bad- yours was 'alicious! Sorry, can't hear ya! K-thx-bye!!! | Blind Optimism (Blinptimism) I cannot see what's in front of me, But I can still plan a route, you see. I may lead us here or there, But I'm sure we'll end up somewhere. Though we may go a bit astray, At any point I'm sure I'll know the best way. So. Mommy, let me lead. We'll both think optimistically. I'll take you where, my heart tells me, The place where we're going ought to be. | Dis handwriting atrocious. Mommy think I c'nt read but I know sum wordses: Cookie: (v), to run toward Bath: (v), to run away Yeas, das my life story in ten lettras or less...
18: Lamby wants Hammy Lamby Lamb was on the lam, from great big, angry Rammy Ram, Because Lamby Lamb ate the Ram's lunch ham, and replaced it with a can of Spam. But to clear the air, it was only fair, because Rammy Ram ate off everybody's plate. So Lamby Lamb was smokin' Rammy Ram on her little tiny lamby gams, Around they ran to Lamby's woe, and how that Rammy's breath did blow. But having just eaten, Lamby couldn't be beaten, while hungry Rammy started to slow. He fell to the floor, toppled with a snore, and Lamby Lamb stole his dinner ham! | Sausage Serenade When I'm doing my reconnaisance, If I find you have some sausages, I'll declare them under my auspices, Your plate of meat will be my treat. I'd eat a sausage, straight out of the garbage; I'd eat a sausage, even in hospice. Your sausages are not safe with me, I'm searching for them continually. I'm a wiener with a wiener, looking for wieners!
19: What To Do With Poo When you're walking along, And you see a big steaming pile of poo Staring up at you. Here's what to do: Plant your face in it! Plant your face in it! Sniff it up. lick it up. Be a disgusting pup. The same goes for A sprinkle of pee That you find on a leaf When you're walking with me. Plant your face in it! Go buck wild, 'Cause soon you're gonna be Right back inside, Away from the poo And away from the pee, And anything exciting scattalogically! | An Outporin' of Yorine I've a waterfall waiting in my peepee, I'll let it out if you ask me nice. Come swim with me In my big pee-pee stream And we'll all have a wonderful time! | Mommy's Lullaby To Atom He hears the phone, he sings along. His name is Atom, he licks his bottom. He picks his ear, then sniffs his toe, Under the blankets, he'll always go. He is my pup, and this I know, He's very dear, I love him so!
20: My Presence is Your Present Thanks for the Invite! I've finally arrived, But I must report that I'm caught up short. I'll have to pee in your lobby, but don't mind me, I'll just use this pot of Mums on your table, There I'm done! Now I'll eat your tea and cakes Till my little tummy aches, Then I'll have a great big poo On the Tuscan tiles of your remodeled loo. Accomplishing that, I'll drink a big vat Of your finest gin and throw it up again! By the time that I leave, You'll be very relieved That I haven't sneezed On your wine and cheese. That would be in bad taste, But I'll not go in haste, I'll aim a big hachoo Directly at your face! No need to thank me, I'm a giver, you see, Giving to others comes naturally to me. My friends know I love them By the quantities of excrement And effluents I leave behind, When I'm gone, for them to find. I tell them what I'll tell you, Bodily fluids say 'I love you!' | The Wizard of Schnoz I'm follerin' my schnoz To see the wizard of Oz. He's gonna make some clicky shoes For Mommy and me too. So we'll be Like Dorothy and Toto, We'll fly over the rainbow, But we won't land in Kansas, The end of the nightmare Is a Blue state for us, Out of Georgia, Where it's going to take An army of stalwart Democrats To clean up all this Republican crap. No, these two bluebirds Want to fly High, high, high into the blue sky!
21: If You Consume Legumes Flatulence can happen When beans sit in your bum; Good chewing is the politest measure To avoid the buildup of gas pressure. So never eat your beans on the run, Always masticate them, Farts may make you comfortable, But they'll never make you friends! | The Mystery of Mister Me I like what I see And what I see is me! I look better in the mirror Than anybody else but me. I didn't know I was in the show, But Mommy told me true, "That's no other dogglie In the mirror, that is you." Now I stare into the mirror adoringly For the chance to get a glimpse Of beautiful, handsome, loverly, Wonderful Mirror-me. | From Space Suity to Pooty Duty I'm an alien, I'm an alien, With smell technology. I take a sniff from my mother ship, No anal probes for me. I've heard it said that down below, The humans will jump through hoops. . I traveled down and sure enough, An Earthling picked up my poops!
22: Imperious Atom We're surveying our great empire, We're waving to our subjects. The peasants never wave back, They feel they're being oppressed. Their discontent too often swells Throughout the middle class as well. When they all start to rebel It's quite enough to ring our bell. The aristocracy Can pay their way, you see. The peasants and the middle class Can't afford to kiss our ass. And our canine monarchy Is much better than theocracy, Which is worse because It's run by other crooks than us. Of course, religion has its usIn in excusing all our class abuse; We rich old coots in Sunday suits will claim God's favor as we steal your boots!
23: Oh, how weary we are from da weight of da Crown. Just closing eyes is luxury now. Let dem eat cakes? No, we eating da cakes! We paying da millerman for flour, da farmerman for eggses, da milkieman for milk. We supporting half dis town making a cake, and everybody wanting a piece. Yesterday, Cook stole prince's golden egg spoon. Scoff, who need an egg spoon dat badly? 'Course we had her drawn and quartered. Oh, dat right, WE needed da egg spoon dat badly. What? It from a set of four!
24: One Percent is Way Too Many of 'Em We're a harmless one-percent, Oppressed by ninety-nine, Who are trying to resurrect the laws we've managed to dissect. We're dismantling you're government, We don't care about your predicament, We fill the media with lies, And kill attempts to democratize. Government is to blame, we cry, Leave it all to Free Enterprise, We'll milk the profits from your overseas war And put the money in a bank offshore. We sell your forests, Pollute your streams, Patent your genes Invent rip-off schemes. We're subsidized To mine your lands, We profit off research From government grants, But we'll never pay A cent of it back, We'll use our PACs To dodge income tax. Now, please, stay polite, Don't bother to unite, You may think you're right, But the bucks decide the fight. | And please don't fret, Certainly don't sweat, We'll do all the work To treat you like a jerk. So screw you, Screw your Mama too, Screw your Daddy, Screw the lot of you. Screw all you 99, 'Cause I got mine! | Hey, I didn''t write this! OMG- is Mommy a Commie???!!!
25: Ho-Hum Ovum When Humpty was hungry, You couldn't constrain him. He'd eat anything if you didn't Restrain him. One night when he'd supped And drank up his cups, Humpty found he couldn't hold His eggshell up. The fat old egg, He lost his legs And started to fall And crashed into a wall! It took all the King's nurses And all the King's men To put Humpty Dumpty Together again. The expense Was so great, Humpty vowed To get in good shape. He watched what he ate And lost some weight, But vanity was His fatal mistake. When Humpty would go on a date, He'd brag "I'm in Egg'cellent shape," And the girls tagged him out At first base. | Stricken Pet Pie Puppydogs are great times twice, But other aminals aren't nice, Making them friends is like rolling dice, Staying away is the best advice. But if you should throw in your lot With some of these tater tots, And they start to show their nasty spots, Put them in place with a witty bon mot. Kitty Kat, Kitty Kat, You ain't all that, Parakeet, Parakeet. You're no good for skeet, Kissy Fish, Kissy Fish, You swim in piss, But you'd all make a fabulous Casserole dish!
26: The Little Dog Straight-Arm He's got his paw in his Mama's eyeball, He's holding it in so it won't fall out. He's doing a public service, Keeping all the eyeballs in. When an eyeball falls out, It happens like that, Eyeballs don't bounce, They just go splat. It's an emergency, He's right on the scene, He's very keen To keep the sidewalks clean. So if you're holding your little babykin, Put him up near your chinny chin, And let him put his paw in your eyeball, So it won't fall out!
27: Whatever you find in your bowl, gobble it up and don't ask questions! | Treat life like it's the last pot of soup from the only restaurant in town.
28: A Pest in Distress There's something on the end of my leash Making noise, I don't know what it is. It's clapping and slapping, And flapping its arms, It's following me. There's something on the end of my leash Making noise, I don't know what it is. It's pulling and calling, and tripping and falling, It's bothering me. Whatever in the world could it be? I'll look back and see... Oh, it's just Mommy!
29: Swan Song: Closer to Home God, please seat me in the Heaviside Layer, The orchestra seats go so fast, Please seat me in the highest highness, I'll watch the world go past Through an opera glass.
30: How I love you Atom, You have let me know, You have told me, little baby, That it's time to let you go. Oh my sweet little Atom, My precious little friend, I'll be right here beside you Till our time together ends. God, who's waiting in Heaven, Will protect you from all harm, And, someday when I cross that bridge, I'll take you in my arms. We will share a house in Heaven, Full of love and joy, And live together forever, My precious baby boy.
31: Hey, Angel Atom! You're back with a message? What's that, you say? Flip the page to go back to the beginning? That's silly. The beginning can't be after the end! You're sure? Well, okay...
32: Opus Atom One On the Existential Duality of the Chiweenie Physicality -OR- The Dachshundicle Pickle I'm a wiener, And my wiener is a wiener. I have two wieners! G'nite Beloved Fans! Thanks for everything. Seeing you at Raimbow Brige!
33: Heavenly Postscript Yes, I did use the word wiener in a poem. Several times. Yes, I am embarrassed. Don't you think I look like these Christmas dolls? Which one said wiener? I'm doin' a little shuffle, you can't tell which one... You say you can see my wiener in this photo? WTF?!? This was published in a national magazine! Y'all are all perverts, IMHO. Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, I'm outta here! Loooove yoouu...
34: OK, I back for minute. I bring extra Christmas present. Yeas, I know it September already. Mommy ever going to finish dis book? It was murder getting Santa hat on over halo! Anyhoo. From Heaven, Papa-God and I have heard Mommy singing dese next songs when she is with my ever-so-much-loved sister, Blondie Bee, and with sweet little Katy Koi, who arrived just in the nick of time.. Please enjoy Mommy's songs when you are with her, because 98% of her brain never thinks about anything else. The other two percent never thinks about anything other than cupcakes. Pets and cupcakes; that's it. Yes, she is confused, most of the time... Now, everyone, sing along! With much love, from Atom Ant, Angel-at-large | ATOM ANT
35: Hum-deedle-dee, it's Mee, Blondie Bee! Thanking you for biskit five minutes ago, but what has you dun for mee lately? U wanting me to stopping beg? Don' Wanna. Yeas that mee in a nutshell. | BLONDI E B EE
36: Blondie the Pythagorean Pooch I cross the street diagonally, At home or in the town, I've got lots and lots and lots of time To greet the folks I'm slowing down. When I cross the street diagonally, Please don't try to correct me, I'm still moving my little feetsies. At least I'm not stopping completely, When I'm crossing inconveniently, Please don't be angry with me. It adds some moments to our day That otherwise we'd work away. Time together for you and me To take a break so happily, And share a slightly longer pass Along a Pythagorean path! | Little Miss Trash I'm little Miss Trash, I have a rash Of dumpsters where I like to eat, Chicken bones and Toblerones And other tasty treats. They're everywhere I roam, Except at home, So I dawdle on my feet, Hoping to find some sweets or meats. Dumpsters are fun, They're full of nums, So I eat like a bum, Until I weigh a ton!
37: Chow Now, Chow Hound Am I a Chow-Chow or a chow-hound, What's the real difference? Momma says about twenty pounds of fat And the will to knock down any fence. Being really fierce is How to be a good Chow, But openin' up my mouth Is how I know to be a good chow-hound. And being very round only adds to my success When I have to press the point- I can drag you very far on the way To an overturned peanut butter jar. I think I've answered my own question, I love food, not aggression. Mommy, I'm a chow-hound, Not a Chowie-Chow now, after all! | What Goes Up May Not Come Down I love to walk, But I don't like hills, Up is fine But down's no thrill. I'll only go up a hill If you'll give me a ride Down the other side. I'm mortified, It's undignified, Let's go back inside And have a treat, And I'll nurse my pride Off my aching feet!
38: Shitty Kitty Bakery I'll get down to my business, please don't make a frown; but, first, I'll eat this little poo-pie sitting on the ground. What's the great attraction? I'll tell you right away why what came out of kitty's ass must now go down my esophagus. Cats are little bakeries, They make their pastries magically, You put food in their tummies And out come little cakes for me! | I Don't Care What I Eat, As Long As It Had Parents Chickens are for eggses, And turkeys are for leggses. Beef is cows And hams is sows. But I can't eat a bit of it, Else I'll get a little itch. I don't know, But Mommy says it's so. She feeds me fish and duck, And hare and bison, I don't care, It's all invitin'. I'm easy to please, Feeding me is a breeze. Just put some meat between my teeth!
39: Canine Mark Twainine The rumors of my tumors Have been greatly exaggerated. Can't a girl have lumps and bumps Without the assumption that she's Losing her gumption? When it's time for me to go I'll let you know, But please don't worry, I'm not in a hurry. As, of course, you know, A treat or three Will make me stronger, But if I stay around longer, by the time you cart me out, I'll be very stout without a doubt. Put my ashes in the place I love the most, Next to the ham hocks In the icebox. | In the Mood for Food I'm recalcitrant, that means I'm very bad, when there's something I want that you don't want me to have. Take cat poop for instance, I'm very resistant, to any attempt to pull me away from my feast, day after day. Is that food you have? Now, I feel strangely repentant. I'm suddenly sure that I've changed my ways, I've reformed myself to the fullest extent. Please let me take a bite. You see, I'm concerned about poison; I'd never forgive myself if I let you die tonight. Just give me one taste, A human life is a terrible thing to waste; I swear it on my left paw I won't enjoy it at all. So you'll give me some? Please put it in my mouth. Oops, I lied, I enjoyed it all the way down!
40: Ugh, get me some Pepto Bismol, Dose guys poetries Is abysmal. | You are loving Katy poetries? No? Hmmm. Has you seeing my fav'rite claws? Dey on middle fingers, biotch... (P.S.: Mommy say I not always hasing to be nice cuz God made speshal rules for kittykats.) | KATY KOI
41: Katy's Chorus Comes Before Us! Well, they had little Atom, But he had to go to Heaven, They had Blondie too, But there was room for two. Then they met Katy, I was Vicky Graves's baby, But Vicky had to roam, and I couldn't stay at home. So they adopted me. I'm an independent cat, I've got a little sass And a lot of class. I'm Katy, I have my own songs, Katy, Everybody sing along! Cause if you don't, My little eyebrowses Will look like the roofs Of tiny pointed houses, And who would want Their cat To have to deal With that? | Kat-Fish I'm Katy Koi, I'm such a joy. I'm a real cutie, My mommy loves me dearly. She brings me toys and treats, I love to play and eat, I'm the Queen of 800 square feet. I'm a little tiny fish In a great, great, great, Big old dish! | Prickly Pear I'm Katy Kitty, I'm very pretty, but if you don't please me I may act shitty. I'm twitching my tail, I'm just a little annoyed, I don't like all that noise, Please don't play with my toys. I'm a little prickly But I know you'll come to love me, I'll be fine unless You try to act like you're above me!
42: Blondie on Katy Kitty had a lot to say From her hinder end today. Kitty made a shitty In her litterbox today. | Katy's Reply Katy is a perfect kitty, Katy is refined and pretty. Katy's litter never reeks, It's only golden eggs she leaks. Katy gave puppydog A biscuit today To add to her already Considerable weight. It did the trick, Puppy started to tip. Now that puppydog Can't stand up straight. | Blondie's Response Stunned silence... | Katy's Reply That's what I thought... | Oh Fudge, They Won't Budge There's an inversion of the feline-canine Location equation, The cat from the bedroom is under The living room couch on this occasion. While the bedroom cat under the couch Is locked out, The living room dog sits shut in the bedroom Making a pout. While mommies try to plan an exchange, So the babies places can change, The cat's afraid, the dog's outraged, Twixt here and there there's no smile anywhere. The cat is refusing all routes, The dog in the bedroom wants out, All is in disarray. Solve the problem a different way, And move away.
43: Atom gone? Where he go? C'n I has his blanket 'n' pillow? Yes? I happy now. | I thought having new Mommy would be hell, but I has to say, he trained you well...
44: Nighttime Midnight is the bestest time to ask for second dinnertime! I'm not shy, I'll get Mommy awake. She's probably just dreaming of me anyway. She'd rather see me for real, I'm sure, just as much as I'd like to see her. She won't mind, she had plenty of rest, sitting all day in front of her desk! | Daytime Mommy's working, It's time for me to beg for attention incessantly! She's using the printer; while it's humming along, I'll sing my little mee-maw song. I'm hungry, it's cold, the sky is gray; I can find stuff to talk about all day. I love you, Mommy, but the day ain't long; come join me on the bed and scratch my little head! | Daily Life | W i t h K-a-t-y
45: Skarlitt O'Furra I'm pretty kitty Katy, I'm a little tortie lady, I'm a lovely southern belle living in a turtle shell. I've got Skarlitt O'Haira beat, Skarlitt didn't land on her feet; but I'm a little kitty cat, we specialize in doing that. All day I lay around, while Rhett Butler (that's Mom) tills the ground to keep my food bowl full. But at night this belle steps out for a dance with her catnip mouse, I whirl and twirl until the dawn, but by morning time my wind done gone! | Bare from Tip to Tail I'm a cat without a hat, I'm a kitty without a liddie. I don't dress like a fashion queen, but the fur I have is clean. So can the haberdasher, I'd rather be a flasher! A naked cat is oh, so cute, until it has to poot!
46: Atom's Very Rude Song About Sweet Little Kittens That Katy Found In Mommy's Notebook By Accident Go get a kitten To clean up this kitchen, We'll lie that we're paying And get it to work. No one likes kittens, So make them wear mittens And clean up our kitchens With a scrubbing brush! | I've finally done it! Struck a blow for every dog who has ever been melted down by cattitude since the beginning of time. This is EPIC! No dog has ever dared to challenge the cat oppressors like this. Come out swinging, all you cats; I'm ready to take on the world!!! | Yaaawwn, That little piece of hambone ain't worth a nibble...
47: Heaven is: A nap in a bundle of friends. | While I napping, I let my cussins entertain you. Here who dey is: My cussins Maggie 'n' Lucy is big dogs dat take care of Mommy debi 'n Daddy Jeff D. an' Uncle Eric 'n Aunt Ashley in far away Origin. My cussins Oreo 'n Owen is kitty kats which let Mommy Robin 'n Daddy Jeff W. live with dem in der house where I stay whenever Mommy gone away.
48: Ain't No Thang But a Chicken Wang by Jeff, as inspired from afar by Atom There once was a poochie from gaw-ga who famously lapped up wing-ettes he was known far and wide for his poops poultry-side and his legacy lives on in our heartsas! | Vittles? Don't say Shmittles! Vittles are yummy, vittles are great! If vittles were gin we'd be inebriate. I'm Lucy, sometimes i pick at my lunch, when I'd rather go outside than eat, but Maggie's a treat, she'll finish my meat while I look for pine cones to crunch. I'm Maggie and I snarf my food down. When Lucy defers, I gobble her leavings; Sometimes, I even get her biscuit in the evening. We're two little girlies, two precious, black pearlies, With our different personalities We live in alternate realities, But in any given locality, Eric and Ashley, And debi and Jeff Are our favorite pets! | P.S. from Maggie and Lucy Though we wish we'd met Atom, we feel that we've known him from all of his poems. But now that you have a cat, we really don't want to meet that! | On the Wing DaddyJeff and Mommy debi search far an' wide for the thang called a wang. | Maggie 'n Lucy's Pack Jeff, debi, Jennie, Ashley, Eric, Jim
49: We've Chosen to Like it Frozen We both love snow. At 20' below we give a great bellow and turn it to yellow. just open the window of your mind; and you'll find you feel dat snow is divine! | The Woe of Snow Snow gives me cold toes, and a fierce runny nose, and chills my thin frame to the bones when it blows. No, I'd much rather stay in the warmth and doze. As far as snow goes, my windows are closed!
50: Surprise!!! From Oreo and Owen Dearest Aunt Becky, we have a difficult confession of a terrible transgression, and a request for your concession. When Atom was here we sometimes would tease him, we thought it much fun, to pester your son. We dressed him in high heels with a purse made of eel peels, and a chiffon ball gown. We thought he would frown. But it went horribly wrong, he burst out in song, like Liza Minnelli, and started to dance ike a tiny Gene Kelly. How could we have foreseen that your dog was a drag queen? Please don't me mad at us, he honestly was fabulous. He sneaked out every night, to perform in the spotlight, and put on well-acclaimed shows in Mommy's best clothes. | We started his career as a talented queer, it must have rained money on your little honey. But he never once mentioned it, we never saw a cent of it, you see how we feel we've been shorted in this deal. It's tragic that he died of whatever disease, but we'd be very pleased if you could cough up some cheese. We hear that you have a cat, now, that's a very wise decision; a cat would not have gone and turned the tables on our derision. As any fool cat would know, a claw across the nose is the proper retort to a catty insult!
51: Atom's Reply Pez Gollem tell me dem cats shit outta luck... | Katy Says Dose kitty kats trying to bogart Mommy cheese? Uh-uh. Dat my cheese, now, suckers.! | Oreo's Final Word Oh, I'm gonna get me some cheese, somewhere! Look out Momma, Oreo's comin' in for landing!
53: Mommy, I sleeping now, so I turn off light. Don't worry, I happy here. Papa-God carries me everywhere on his little pony, named Segway. (I think it's Fronch). The angels love our old songs and we all join in whenever we hear you singing. Watching bridge every day. Plz bring cheezburger for chiweenie when you come. It turn out kolesterol come from Hell. Hamburger blow up Heavenly grill. Who knew? Loving all, so great family 'n' friens. Taking care of each other while I looking down; else I poopie in your soupie. Yeas, I can do dat from here... See ya soon! Papa-God say he want two cheezburger! 'k, thx, bye! Loving you, Dearest Atom Underfoot Final Bow, XOXOXO
56: For All My Furry Babies Look at all my clothes, They're covered With your hair. It's okay, I love you anyway, A little fur don't hurt, It just covers up the other stains. To all the little babies Who've lent me their coats, Thank you for keeping my heart From getting cold. Without the little bits that you each gave, I wouldn't be who I am today!
57: To Atom's Fans It's time for us to move on, now. We will meet our little man again at the Rainbow Bridge one day. Thanks for reading our book. We love you one and all! Becky 'n' Atom July 4, 1998-August 15, 2002-Dec 16, 2013