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Mom's book

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Mom's book - Page Text Content

S: Family Memories of 2011

FC: Family Memories of 2011

1: Great shot of the grandkids. Wait. Great shot except for Stuart. He has his eyes rolled up in the back of his head in every shot. And Katherine has her tongue hanging out of her mouth. James is cross eyed. And Drew... Drew, I'm not even sure what you are doing. Oh my word. Kids, we are going to have to retake this.

3: The local neighborhood cat was being interviewed by Channel 2 News about his thoughts on the snow. Apparently, he used too many 'colorful' adjectives to describe his experience in the snow and the interview could not be broadcast on the nightly news.

4: Hmmm. According to Georgia Power there needs to be 'X' number of feet between boat houses in order for us to be able to built one ourselves. I wonder if their boathouse could be 'moved' over some if that would help. (minutes later) No. It would take too much T-N-T. It may draw too much attention, especially with Billy's boathouse being blow out of Rabun County too. Oh, well.

5: "Wow. Stuart, I never noticed before how big your feet have gotten." "Thanks for noticing Grandmommy. They are pretty heavy too." "Ouch! Stuart, your standing on my foot." "Like I said Grandmommy, my BIG feet are kind of heavy." | What! Now Stuart, for as long as we've been married, you know the kitchen towel on the left side has always been used for hands only, not dishes. Wait, did I say left. I really meant right. I think. Isn't that correct? Chris, is this being recorded? Now son.

6: Fire in the room. Now Chris, you have to get up pretty early in the morning to fool me. Just because I smell smoke, hear loud crackling and my backside feels really hot doesn't mean I'm going to fall for your silliness, son. | Generations

7: (top) Ready, cheese. click "Awe, who did the fluffy?? I'm done with the picture." "I think Jack and I are as well." "Grandmommy, you did it didn't you." "Now Lamar, I heard it come from your direction." "No it didn't" "Yes it did" "No it didn't..." | What are you doing sister. Wait. Awe, not again. I sure wish they would stop picking me up every time they want to take a picture. I think I'm going to be sick. You won't be smiling then sister.

8: Chris in Scotland.

9: "Wow. That memory still seems pretty fresh even after 30 years. Gee Chris, thanks for bringing this up and rehashing everything. Kim, could I interest you in a glass of wine." | "Oh no, Chris. I won almost every Parcheesi and Trivia Pursuit game we played as kids. You won like, maybe two games our entire childhood. So there!" "Way to go Chris. Great way to ruin a good evening." (Margaret)

10: "Margaret, there are some really cool features with this new camera. These were some of the pictures I took at the beach this week and when I push this button... wait. What! What happened??" "It looks like you just deleted all the pictures on your camera Furman. Did you back it up." | "That's 7 wins in a row Lamar." "Maggie, that's not right. I think you're cheating." "I only cheated on 3 of them so it really doesn't matter." "Oh, ok."

11: "Stuart, I've tried kitchen cleaner, bathroom cleaner, Comet, laundry detergent and bleach. I know you even tried gasoline. The markings are still showing on the walls and floor." "Kay, do we even know how Jack got hold of Margaret's ultra weather proof red lip stick in the first place?" | Well, the police may have stolen our cabanas, but they can't steal our joy... Hope those little #$@&!@!*#^&% turtles have a good evening.

12: Hey, I'm Furman Buchanan. We have a reservation to play Putt Putt... Oh, wait a minute, sir. Before you call police, please let me explain about all the phone calls. It really was a misunderstanding. I didn't mean to call your business, home and cell number... and your mother's number... and your broker's number... your wife's gynecologist? Really? Sorry. I was just trying to find out if you had any discount days for Putt Putt. Actually, my brother-in-law called one of the times using my name and... No sir, I'm not trying to put the blame on anybody else... Oh, great. Thanks for you understanding. | "Ok folks. Step right up, we're in business thanks to my wheelin' and dealin'." "Dad it didn't sound like we got in because of your wheelin' and..." "Finley, honey, we don't need your input right now. I think we are all ready to play. I'd like a orange ball please."

13: Oh good grief! I've been stuck on this hole for 20 minutes. I should have picked a red ball instead of the green one. (below) "Dad, you realize if you make this shot you will be in the lead and will probably win the tournament." "Really. Me, win the whole thing. Cool." "Laura, you told me the same thing on the last hole and I missed the shot As a matter of fact, I think you've been telling everyone here the same thing. Your distracting us so you can win." "Figured out my diabolical plan did you Stuart. Might have worked if it wasn't taking me 5 shots for each hole."

14: Did you see that hole in one. I purposely banked it off the palm tree and then the trash can. What skill. I wish I had video taped that shot. | ... and Finley, I don't think we need any negative comments from you about that awesome shot I made. | No, you can't help me! This is my sand, these are my sand toys and this is my space. I wasn't raised to share, so beat it. | Wow. She must have woken up this morning with a crab in her bed. | Oh darn. I got my hair wet. | Don't worry Dad. We aren't going to jump.

15: I'm just disgusted that I dropped the camera in the ocean. Now I have a little fish swimming around in the display. I can't even tell what I'm trying to take a picture of because that fish keeps getting in the way. Hope he doesn't expect me to feed him.

16: No holes dug near the cabana and no sprained ankles equals a great vacation. | Son, we have a long line forming. I know you wanted to make a hole-in-one on the very first hole, but we have been here 15 minutes and are going to have to move on. Maybe next time you won't bet Drew 3 Hot Wheel cars and 2 piece of bubble gum that you could make the shot. Now let's go. | Oh my word! I just got out here and wanted to relax, not get my hair wet. May I can jump over this wave... SPLASH Oh, that ***censored PG13 material*** wave!

18: James, I don't know if you should do the thumbs-up thing to Dede. It might get too bumpy. Whoa! James its too fast. We have to slow down or we might get killed or something. Can Dede see me. Oh, there we go. That's better. | "Finally, it's our turn. OK Dede, crank it up as fast as it will go." "I don't think that is such a good idea Maggie." Vroom! "Oooh. I sure wish I had gone to the potty before we left." "Me too. Ahhhh!!"

19: "No one stands up to 'The Wonder Twins'. Right Finley?" "Couldn't have put it better myself. Let's ride Dede! Whoa!!! I can barely hang on. I'm slipping. I think we are going to die Katherine!!!!!" "Wait. I'm too young to die Finley... or even drown" | Girls. Always screaming. Guess I'll have to show them how to do it. Good thing I'm tied in the tube and can't fly out. Of course, if it flips over I'll be stuck and might drowned. Hope Granddaddy slows down soon.

20: Forth of July fireworks at the lake.

21: "Louise! (sigh) I think if we just ignore them they will go away. Now where were we. Oh, yeah..." | Live in person, the one, the only... my sister. She will be doing her best Kermit The Frog imitation. Prepare to be amazed! | "Stuart, you and Finley both have mischievous looks on your faces. What are you planning." "Oh, I don't know Katherine. Maybe an ambrosia run when no one is looking." "Oh, no you don't Finley. You can't get by us." "I don't know about that. I'm sure Stuart has some kind of stealth-like Batman gadget that will allow us to sneak right by you. Right Stuart?" | "Hi Ho, Kermit the Frog here. Ribbit, ribbit." "Very good Kay. I told them they would be amazed, didn't I."

22: What! No, I'm not going to give you my lunch Emma. You are just using me for my food. I'm out of here. | I don't know who scraped half the icing off this cake, but it infuriates me. I had to get Finley to make some more." "Kay, I have three guess." | The accusations against the Davis family didn't stick. It was later discovered that Finley was the icing bandit. She mixed up another batch for Grandmommy after feeling guilty about almost destroying the cake. Must keep an eye out for her in the future. | WANTED | ICING BANDIT $1.45 REWARD

23: As my great grandfather use to say, 'There will be no wine before its time.' | Well Furman, as my great grandfather use to say 'There's no time like the present.' So either start the pouring or hand over the bottle. | "So Daddy, how is your head? Do you still have a lump on it from getting hit over the head with the wine bottle?" "Yeah Katherine, it's still there, but the headache is almost gone." "Well Dad, maybe next time you should just hand over the bottle of wine instead of trying to run and hide it. Like Barney use to say, 'It's better to share your cookies then eat them all... or something like that." "Oh, Katherine. Spare me."

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  • By: Chris D.
  • Joined: over 6 years ago
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  • Title: Mom's book
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  • Started: over 6 years ago
  • Updated: over 6 years ago