S: monsters and joyriding
FC: monsters and joyriding | annie wigley
1: monsters and joyriding | by annie wigley
3: First Period 4/21/09 the sun is out the day is staggering with perfection the grass is wet but I still lie in it my paper is getting soaked I should write faster there’s a lot to do but none of it has to be done everything’s important but nothing really matters they call dandelions weeds but they don’t bother me at all.
4: Write. Hate. Love. Burn. 8/12/08 I’m so bored I’m writing this. Thinking of words to give it a twist. Wasting ink so I won’t sleep. Until just before the alarm says BEEP. I’m so bored I’m hating this. My masterpiece without a kiss. Wasting paper so I won’t eat. Wishing my handwriting wasn’t so neat. I’m so bored I’m loving this. Throwing it away just to be missed Wasting my life so I won’t write. Maybe I am too uptight. I’m so bored I’m burning this. Lighting a match, making a list. Wasting fire so I won’t die. But maybe this is all just a lie.
7: Green Friends = Us 8/19/08 You’re painting, red and blue and green, Hating those muddy colors in between. Smearing here and there, paint is everywhere. The mess is half the fun.
8: Off the Target 3/21/09 These bubblegum pink pants, Out to put you in a trance. The cheap zipper and shoddy stitching, Will maybe distract you from all of my bitching. They’re skinny, unlike me, But oh that’s right, you’ll just have to see. These bubblegum pink trousers Should leave you saying “wowsers” They my be a bit tight, I may have to pull them on with all my might, But we all agree it’s okay. After all they never stay on the whole day.
11: The Final Countdown 4/13/09 It’s a race, you say? No it’s a stopwatch Counting down decades, years, months, weeks days, hours, minutes, seconds. How long do you have? I can’t say. Maybe you will go today. Find this thing, heaven, you speak of Harps playing, watching from above. How do you know you’ll go there? What if you sit in the ground with rotting bones and hair. Or what if you burn with my buddy Satan? Warm and toasty deep within, I can’t say. Live your life for each day.
12: New Bed, Old Sheets 5/4/09 I have a new bed, Got it yesterday. And I scratched my head When I awoke this morning Because there’s all this space But no one anyplace To share it with. I have no memories With my old bed No secrets between the sheets No regrets with cheeks bright red I have nothing I have no one. I am tired, But not sleepy. I am rushed, With plenty of time But I want to have to hold my tongue, Bite back words before them come. It’s no fun sharing a bed with Solitude.
15: Forget or Regret 8/19/08 You bleeding, but there is no scrape. No gash, no would, nothing to gape. You’re heart is broken, that I see. But I can’t help what must be. You tell yourself to forget, So there is less to regret. While your tears blend with the rain, The blood with set a haunting stain, And no doctor can fix this break, There is no saying how long it could take, To mend the torn, repair the rust, Clear off the shelves and blow off the dust, And hope that all goes as planned. For without a heart the world is bland.
16: Life Preserver 3/21/09 A night can lie. Fun is temporary. Life is infinite If you make it be. Songs change You don’t have to. But it is an option. There are many dead ends On the roads of life, Don’t let one wrong turn Drain your battery Bust out the jumper cables, Or hitch a ride Make sure you’re in a good neighborhood.
19: Shattered and Lost Eyes 10/1/08 It’s hard to see when your eyes get foggy. When you break an eye it gets replaced. But scratches, drips, across its face Can really get annoying. It’s hard being able to lose your eyes When they can be sat on and abused. Because when you lose your eyes You get confused.
20: The Swimmer 4/1/09 I paddle and kick with all of my might, And hope there’s nothing there to bite. But the murky, dark water isn’t promising. The swaying kelp tells my something lurking. I swim and swim, fast fast faster, And every time I check the shore gets further. I’m struggling now to keep the pace, Knowing I’ll be the loser of this deadly race. But I kick and kick, and feel a tired pull, Like every part of me is sinking, I feel dull. And that kelp and seaweed keeps shivering, Telling me there’s something under me with teeth glimmering. So I try to pick up my speed, Swimming away from those quivering reeds. My exhaustion only slows my down. And my frantic mind instinctively darts around, Looking for an easy way out, There are none, is no hope just doubt. So I swim and I swim and get further away, Wondering what would’ve happened if I’d stayed. Thinking of what couldn’t eater me back there, With ferocious teeth and matted dark hair. What would kill me, make me cease to exist, And my sheets and thoughts knot and twist.
23: Power’s Out 4/3/09 in the bathroom blow drying my hair putting on makeup brushing my teeth when everything becomes silent and still except for my music which begins to fill the darkness around me it screams out loud lifts this dark depressing cloud the only reaction near me I just keep to my routine I am unaffected by this lack of light I don’t notice how it feels like night I don’t stumble or fumble crash or smash I find my way like it was light as day the power’s out but I never notice.
24: Friends 4/20/09 Funyuns cameras and gum Happiness laughter and then some This day will be filled with fun Hold up a second I want to run Your face is drifting in the warm sun When we laugh our heads are bouncing.
27: Wednesdays 5/7/09 My pants have holes, but it’s okay, I like the way they look when they fray. Walking in the rain with friends, I start to forget those ragged ends. The purple stitching’s coming undone, all we need to do is have more fun, and the tears will become untorn the wears become unworn. our feet are all frozen and soaked, but it’s all about next week that I’m stoked. Even if my pants stay in this shape, I can just buy some duct tape, And fix what needs fixing, Mix what needs mixing. My pants have holes, but it’s okay, Today was a truly amazing day.
28: Absent 4/23/09 I was on the bus when I got your message. You were on the verge of tears for your lost son. I was wishing I had emotion to hide. Those strangers across from me don’t know, can’t tell How sad I am because my face hasn’t changed a bit. I have no tears to hold back No expression on my blank face. I knew him for a week But he means so much to me as a friend. I suppose he’s not the only thing I’ve lost today.
31: Watermelon 3/21/09 Even if you do end up leaving me behind, Don’t start to say something and then “never mind” I’m in a bind. My new friends are so kind, But a true friend is hard to find. And the past, you can’t rewind. I don’t want to be tossed out like A watermelon rind.
32: Get a Ride 4/27/09 We will get there, I’ll make sure of it. If we have to walk, I’ll bring my comfy shoes. If we have to sprout wings and fly, I’d be up for that. But if we don’t end up going, Heads will be split. Lives will be conquered. Time will be stopped. We will get there, I’ll make sure of it.
35: Lose the Mask 5/5/09 we don’t know how to take off our masks, and let this feeling last. untie that tangled know, and start again seeking what we sought. learning to relax and have fun even under the glaring sun. those four strings can only hold onto me for so long, my own rhythm must live with being wrong and I’m afraid you’ll just have to run with it.
36: happiness = 247 16 + 0.5 = me me + 2 = you time(you) – 2 = time(me) time(me) + you = time(our) time(our) = 1 1 + 80,084 = 80,085 80,085(me) = 0 0 + (25 • (5 •x 2)) - 3 = 247 247= i like you too
39: Punishing Rainbows 4/26/09 When wrong feels right And you’ve have a good night Life seems to slow down Your brain starts to mess around Your conscience struggles to take flight And step around a potential fight But when you wake up and your thoughts are finally sound You wish your feet would never touch the ground.
40: Ignore-ance 5/1/09 I said it’ll be a good day Even if it’s not, I’m happy anyway. I got a bounce in my step, a smile on my face, Being sad or angry or mad would bring me disgrace. The sun is out, the birds are flying, And even though I’m sure someone is dying, That smile on my faces is here to stay Because it’s a fucking gorgeous day.
43: Back and Forth 5/5/09 I’ve been flying for so long listening to the same damn song as it repeats the words again and again my minds starts to go insane. It’s losing itself in freefall Stuck in a rut, hitting a wall. I’m fine, to you that’s what I’ll say. Ask me again some other day.
44: If You Sit There 12/2/08 I love the red, the white, the blue, It stops the face from staring down at you. I love the sea of stars, It hides twelve and one from where you are. I love the contrast of the white and red, It distracts you from the hands and what they’ve said. I love the flag, the colors are most wonderful, They help make chemistry a little less dull.
47: No 4/13/09 adolescence it’s presence unavoidable a good bad friend extreme emotions unconscious it’s not a trend don’t trust me just a kid unreliable moody know what I did?
48: 10:59 5/4/09 10:59 I’m out of time No more words to write Turn out the light and good night My pen’s the wrong color In contrast it makes my words sound duller This red ink doesn’t help me think It makes my heart sink With the words would run pink Stop my mind on the brink Teetering, tottering Just cracking, no soldering Coals of the fire smoldering Wondering What tomorrow will bring Hope for sun, bright and happy, Always ends up dark and crappy, | Raining on my parade Never stopping, letting them invade No warning, this is a raid Of my thoughts Though they’re twisted into knots Good luck uncoiling this mess Just lay down with the rest Join our safe nest of the best Failures. We fail you, not us. Wipe off your own dust Check your brain for rust Before you continue Just don’t stumble and fall It’s a long way to crawl And with no one to call You start of feel small.
51: 180 = (5/25/09) 3.14 I have that I know more 15 that I waste my time 265 hold my nose and dive 358 tell myself it’ll be great 979 that it’ll be fine 323 hold on with me 846 doing this just for kicks 264 I want some more 338 don’t feel the hate 327 I found heaven 950 I have to go 288 feeling great 419 some other time