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A Little Bit of This and A Little Bit of That

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S: A Little Bit of This, & A Little Bit of That by Lynda Bell 2012

BC: So this morning while sitting at a red light, I saw the reflection of me in my bug in a store window. I waved at myself so I could start the day off seeing a friendly face..... :)

FC: The beauty of nature cannot be created by mankind, only captured. But the beauty of our lives is created through the songs and stories we share from our heart. The love we show to each other is the thread that keeps the beauty of being human alive. And God has to smile when our compassion graces another life. | A Little Bit of This, & A Little Bit of That. by Lynda Bell

1: The love of a good cup of coffee and the unconditional love of our animals are two things that are shared by even the worst of enemies. Maybe to find peace among humans, we could explore the qualities of these two things.

2: This book is a collection of my writing from my journals, and also some of my favorite photographs. The words on these pages are just a few of my thoughts about life and some of the lessons I have learned. They are also expressions of my grief as I continue to work through the loss of my Father. These pages are a mirror of what I have pondered about the changes I need to make in order to be a better person. I don't expect everyone to agree with my thoughts as they have evolved, or even appreciate them, but I hope you will find something in these pages to help you realize that life is truly a gift and the personal choices we make each moment affect humanity as a whole. With Grace, Lynda Bell

3: I want to thank my most beautiful Mother for always, always encouraging me to write down my feelings and to just be myself. Like most Mothers and Daughters, we haven't always agreed on the choices I've made or the paths I have taken, but I have never ever doubted how much she loves me. I love you Mom. | Merelene Barnes Bell (Tootsie)

4: "I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is "Who in the world am I?" Ah, that's the great puzzle." Alice, from Alice in Wonderland. by Lewis Carroll I used to be afraid of this story because all I could feel was the chaos. Now I can see that when we are challenged with our biggest opportunities for spiritual growth, the chaos is necessary. Chaos can be a catalyst for the change we are being guided toward, or we can get lost in the seemingly never-ending sequence of events that become more and more unbearable. This blackness has often been referred to as The dark night of the soul. Chaos will crack the facades we have created and also those that have been created for us. The facades that we believe define us and the world around us. The beliefs that were told to us by those who may or may not have had our best interests in mind. Those cracks can cause great fear because we are challenged to look at truths that may be foreign to the beliefs we have been filtering most of our lives. Our souls become naked and vulnerable. It is in the silence of the eye of that storm that we begin to have clarity. It is there that we hold that conversation just between us and God. The chatter of all those things that we should have, or could have done falls away. The chatter of the pain we have suffered at the hands of those who have chosen to find solace in the chaos also falls away. And the loudness of our grief from losing those that used to walk with us is silenced. The beauty of who we were created to be brings us to our knees in humbleness. Then we weep, not because of where we have been, but because we feel the immenseness of the love that was imparted to us and we wish for others to know that love. The love that will heal all wounds, and connect us to everything else that has ever been. I now see that I have traveled back and forth between being present for that conversation, and my own personal | About Chaos...

5: chaos for many years. Today I am not afraid to hear the story my creator has to tell me. Just us. Our story about an agreement made before I came into this world where I am to bring my own uniqueness as a gift of offering to help others to heal. Those who have also gotten lost in the chaos. Who in this world am I? Today I heard a story of how the sun was created to rise every day to greet my spirit, and then to shine it's light on those I am to share this gift of love with. So when I see the next stone in my path, I know that I can hold presence there until the sun returns. The light may shine in a new direction, and that will be ok. Thus my chaos becomes peace. My Creator's love sustains me. I encourage all of you to enter that space and hold that conversion. Just between you and the one who knew you before you entered the womb of this earth. Listen with your heart. Like Alice, we have changed in the night. Today holds a piece of our puzzle. We have promise that God will show us the path of life, and in His presence we will have fullness of joy. That promise holds different meaning for me today than yesterday, but as in my favorite quote by T.S. Eliot, I have made that full circle of spiritual beliefs, and can find peace here, not from the same space as David, but from the same heart. I see the faces of all those, who through their love, have helped me see the pieces of my puzzle along the way, and I am thankful for you. Who will I be tomorrow? I hope I find myself holding hands with every one of you, even if we are not walking together. I hope I have left the last stone warm so you can find rest, and maybe hear that still, small voice inside. The voice of the one who wants to tell your story. What are your gifts? Who are you sharing them with? As Alice, we all need to think about how we are different this morning, and it is then that we can find great joy in our sameness.

6: This morning I was sitting out on my swing by the lake, and just trying to clear my head and listen to the messages God wanted me to hear from his world of nature. This is what I heard... Turtle Dove... "Remember that gifts are given with no strings attached and feel the hope of new beginnings." Bullfrog... "Honor your tears because they cleanse your soul." Robin... "New growth is occurring." Cricket... "Change is possible by shifting through the chaos with reflection and patience." Buster, my old Labrador... "Just love me, and I'm hungry right now." Leave it to your dog to remind you to just keep life simple.

7: Ponder this thought today. That person you can't stand holds the very lesson from your soul that you have been blinded to. If you could describe the characteristic that bothers you the most about that person and then take off the blinders that hate has placed, you will notice areas of your life that contain that same characteristic. Acknowledge, forgive, and be grateful for the lessons we receive from each other that make us more merciful and loving. God's mercy humbles me today. | I don't know everyone's stories, I just know recognizing that in our humanness, we all share the good, the bad, and the ugly. I tend to obsess when someone does something that I consider unjust, and I have been trying to break that habit by looking deeper. For example, last week someone got mad about the way I handled a situation. Before talking to me about it, they wrote a very nasty and judgmental email to someone and mis-stated the facts. For days, as usual, I had conversations in my head about how they shouldn't have jumped to conclusions, etc. There were so many things that were wrong about this misunderstanding, but one characteristic that I felt was most damaging to me was the power of anger in her words. Our words can be healing and they can be devastating. I had to admit to myself that I have done that very same thing. I have used words as weapons before investigating deeper to see how my perception changed what was truth. Every day we are given a clean slate to forgive and create better emotional health. I chose to forgive her so I could forgive myself. The same goes when I feel someone is being selfish, etc. That doesn't mean not speaking up, it just means not letting the power of hurtful behavior hurt me over and over. We are all here to help each other on that path Home.

8: Just because someone judges you for being different"doesn't necessarily make it bad. What can they do, negatively judge you to death? Author Unknown | "When you meet someone who triggers negative emotions in you, then they hold a key lesson. Those are the times you need to step back and look inside. | The question is.. Are you going to believe someones story about you or are you going to write your own?

9: Lessons Learned... | I have spent many hours trying to figure out why I have trouble dealing with some of the people I have had to work with over the last few years. While I have stood on my soap box and spoke out about the times when we need to stand up for ourselves and others, I have also been conflicted with separating and owning my own reactions and behavior. I ask myself if I am taking on their bad behavior by not being able to ignore it or let it go. While I am responsible for my reactions and behavior, I will not own the bullying of others. Have I always reacted the right way? No. Am I in the process of learning how to react in a positive manner? Yes. After many hours of thoughtful consideration, it keeps coming back to this one truth, I know that it is never ok to allow someone to mistreat me or others. I have also learned that I can trust my intuition when the words and actions of others are hurtful or dishonest. Can I change their behavior? No. Can I change mine? Yes. Instead of beating myself up over the things I could have said or done, I am going to be thankful that in the midst of my sometimes overreaction to the manipulation of others, I have finally learned to respect myself enough to try and bring light to the bad behavior. Then I am free to walk away if they are not willing to be respectful of me or others. So, I am going to quit berating myself for not just going with the flow when the flow is drowning me. Instead of staying and continuing to swim upstream, I will try to stay present in the moment, yet never be afraid to climb out, and if necessary, to find a new stream where I can flow and be in alignment with my conscience.

10: It had not been raining this morning, so imagine my surprise when I saw this rainbow just after a curve in the road. My phone camera didn't quite capture it's beauty. Two things that I learned this morning are: 1) A rainbow doesn't need rain to appear. So, we should never be surprised to see a rainbow just around a bend in the road of life. In fact, look for it. 2) There may be a storm on the other side of the rainbow even if it's not raining where you are standing. So, on the other side, someone may be in the middle of a personal storm and need to know we love and support them. One phone call may just give them the strength to change their perspective and see that very rainbow we are looking at. :)

11: Sometimes it is hard to ask for help for many reasons. We don't want to bother anyone or we don't want to feel obligated. Sometimes it just comes down to we don't want others to know our needs because we fear they will judge us. That is so sad because Jesus looked upon everyone he met with a heart of love. He offered healing, mercy, and forgiveness, So when you feel burdened to help someone, remember to do so unconditionally and with no judgment. Don't help, and then expect them to be something more than they are at that moment. Just help.

12: Yesterday I attended a funeral of an old friend. Today I was watching the show Hoarding: Buried Alive, and listening to a lady talk about how she was saving jars in case she ever made homemade soup. I started relating her overwhelming need to save things with my obsessive need to learn about everything because I feel I might need that knowledge someday. This "hoarder" had so many unfulfilled dreams and was afraid that by getting rid of anything, the dream would be over. I want to do so many things that I have forgotten what my original dream was. All I remember is that I started on a quest for spiritual truth and ended up with so many ideas, theories, and tools that I am actually no farther than I was when I started, just more confused. I have so many books to read, so many certifications to complete, so many classes to attend, so many lessons to learn, and so many people to help, that I have no space in my life to move them around any more. In trying to volunteer and help everyone else, I forget that I exist. Today I see my life from a new reality. I have everything in my life to be completely happy, so why isn't that enough? Why do I feel guilty because I am here and some will never make it? | Calling Me Home...

13: Every theory, every religion, every political party, and every opinion will have a seed of truth in it. I need to just refocus on living this moment today. I am married to a wonderful husband who cares about who I am (even if he doesn't understand why I do what I do), I live on a beautiful farm, I have a horse, two incredible dogs, and I can walk in nature every day, I have food in my refrigerator, and I have an awesome family who is changing everyday that I am gone saving the world. I need to remember that I am not a failure if I don't have all the answers because no one does. All I know is that if I can't be happy with my life as it stands now, then that is what I need to change. Today, these are the things I know... I will work when I need to, but strive to be at home all the moments I can. I also need to honor that I am an introvert and need time alone. I accept that I may never know all who God is during this lifetime, but someday I will know. I am ready to retire my dream of fixing everyone or making everyone happy. I am refocusing my attention to my commitments at home. I have done what I can and now I need to completely replenish me. My spirit is too scattered and I am calling it home. Again I am reminded of my favorite quote by T.S. Eliot,"We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time."I know this place. I am content here.

14: "Our kinship is s a long forgotten memory that kindness reawakens. | When I think of the word homeless, I visualize a picture of an unconsidered person with sad eyes who has lost hope. I realize that while I have always had a place I called my home, there have been times in my life that I have existed in that place unconsidered, sad, and with no hope. Homelessness has many faces, and is not just a physical condition, but can also be a state of mind. Take a moment to consider yourself. Do you feel at home in your body? With your emotions? In your spiritual faith? Think of one place where you feel completely at home". How would you describe the qualities of that place? What changes would you have to make to share those qualities and be "at home" in your physical, emotional, and spiritual body? Consider yourself.....

15: My drug of choice.... Love. I Hope I don't ever run out and have to steal it. ; ) | People use the phrase, "Life isn't fair" to justify their actions. I realize many things happen that are out of our control. Yet while life may not always seem fair, you and I can be, at work and at home. Today I challenge all of us to be fair in all our thoughts and actions, toward ourselves and others.

16: I appreciate the right of freedom of speech, but we also have a responsibility to promote the change we say we are seeking. When we are in a position to influence others and we make general derogatory remarks about groups we dislike, we only promote more anger. Leaders need to stand up and consider the impact they have on others because there is a powerful energy behind hatred and discrimination. | About Opinions... | All of our thoughts have an energy that continues to produce actions. Be aware of what you manifest today.

17: I agree we need to find the positive in every situation and move forward with that hope of change. But that doesn't mean complete avoidance of negative situations or turning a blind eye to those things that need our positive influence. It's all about balance in these critical times of transformation. | I am very impulsive when I get an idea. I think it in my head, then I just jump right on my "awesome idea wagon." All is good until I ask "Hey, who's driving this wagon?"

18: More Lessons Learned... | One of the most important things I've learned is that you need to listen to your intuition about what people are really saying. Are their words saying they value you? If not, or they disregard you in any way, then you really don't have to make a choice at all because they have made it for you. Walk away, even if they call it a dishonorable discharge.... < | Orange and Purple Tulips, Unicorns, and Birthday Cake.... Life is what YOU make it, so pick the crayons You want to color it with.

19: “Just take a deep breath when you become frustrated and let go of the outcome. Otherwise your worry will become tangible and change the reflection of your dreams.

20: “This is what I love about music.... Add poetry and sound to the uniqueness God gave us and you will always get a different message that speaks to someone.” | We are a product of many dreams that came before us, and we carry those dreams of our ancestors within us. | The beauty of giving from the authenticity of your uniqueness is priceless. It is never wasted, even on those who may not understand or seem to appreciate it."

21: This afternoon I was reminded that even though you get revisited by old demons, they don't have permission to finish writing your story unless you let them. The magic is still present, even in the fog. | It's always a good thing to be able to see which road is the high one, especially when the fog of deception has lifted. Sometimes until your heart adjusts to the light, they both may appear to look the same. | Fog Magic...

22: Empathy sometimes places us in someone else's shoes so we learn to see life from another view. This teaches us not to judge. But, we also have to be mindful to take their shoes off and to put our own shoes back on. If we forget, we not only intrude on another's path, we are no longer present to walk on our own."

23: It takes a tremendous amount of courage to look in a mirror at our perception of who we have become.... Then it takes even more courage to look within ourselves and see who we really are. But if we can close our eyes and open our hearts to see the vision of our life that God had when he breathed us into existence, we can know the beauty of both. That beauty is the story of our life, inside and out." | "If what you are saying does not align with your actions, the conflict will begin to affect your health. The thing you need to acknowledge is that some part of you doesn't truly believe what you are saying and you have begun to question life on a deeper subconscious level.”

24: Reflections of A Father Carl Jung believed that a collective unconscious served as a form of psychological inheritance that contained all of the knowledge and experiences we share as a species. This collective unconsciousness is believed to contain archetypes which have been described by Jean Benedict as original, inherited patterns, or forms of thought and experience. According to Jung, archetypes are the ancient, unconscious source of what we think, do, and say as humans. These patterns have been thought to shape our perceptions of the world. The belief is that we inherit these archetypes, yet each of us fills in the content by the way we experience our lives. My question is, do archetypes change as the world evolves?" If so, can moving away from that instinctual survival thinking to a more evolved higher spirituality call for the Father archetype to evolve also? I believe the ideas of those who come before us evolve not only through words and actions, but also genetically through the choices we make. Jung's description of the Father archetype was one of a stern, powerful authority figure. My own Father made choices that helped to integrate the energy of that stern self-disciplined protector with a kinder and gentler Father who can stand on his integrity to be the foundation of authority and leadership needed for power. A Father who doesn't need to exert his power or strengthen it by stealing the spirit of those he protects. This leaves his children not only with a solid foundation of integrity, but with their souls intact to be able to love unconditionally. How does the image of God correlate with the Father archetype? What form or image of a Father is the world crying out for today? What can we do to be that change so the form of the Father archetype changes for the generations that follow? What can I do to support that change? In memory of John M. Bell Jr. June 21, 1931 - September 25, 2009 | A raindrop got caught in my eye today on it's way to water my Father's grave.

25: I love storms. The excitement of the wind, the strength of the lightning, and the majestic sound of the thunder. In the midst of the storm, I see Dad and I sitting out on our front porch just being. What I miss most about him is the beauty of not needing words or any outward expressions of love because our mutual love of nature spoke for us. | When you lose a parent every cell in you knows that pain of loss. It is best not to try to bury your grief or escape from it through vices, just continue crying out. Above all, don't put a time limit on your healing, your real friends will stay. When the grief has worked it way out, then God can change your pain of missing them to Joy at the blessing of having them in your life. | Dad... What does a year feel like in Heaven, does it seem like yesterday? ...Do you remember those you have left behind? Do you feel our tears dropping one by one on your new song, changing each note? Are you watching that cloak that separates worlds?

26: Yesterday I cried because of my perception of the world I created. Today I cry because I miss yesterday.” | This morning I was thinking about joy and remembering the things Dad found joy in those last few weeks. ~Anyone who would Wave to him, ~The Prettiest Girl he ever saw 56 years later, ~A Cup of Coffee, ~Fixing the line on his fishing pole and giving it to his Grandson Brock, ~Being able to sit outside and feel the Sun, ~Listening to his Great-Grandson, Jacob, singing, ~Long John Silvers, ~Mama making it home from the store, ~Family holding his hands and Praying, ~Visits from Any Family because he loved not just some of us, but All of us. What things are you finding joy in today? | Sometimes I wish I could go back in time, not to change the course of things, but to appreciate the people in my life more than I did.

27: We begin our lives with very special people, called family that form our foundation. Even when our lives go in different directions and different spaces, a crack appears when they leave our sight in this world and pass on to the next. I do believe some form of them is still always with us and I see them in the beauty in nature.

28: About Spiritual Things... | While praying, I thought I heard crying, then realized it was just my soul breathing. Then I knew the answer.... | Unless others recognize love manifested in our life, they will turn another way. Hatred and judgment are heavy cloaks that hide us, sometimes even from ourselves. | If the truth shall set you free, then you will know freedom within your religion. Has your faith set you free or are you oppressed by the words of man? According to Jesus, We have been freed from the law by grace. If someone is telling you otherwise, then they don't know truth because they are still shackled. God does not dwell in their hearts or their words. | "We were given a precious and sacred gift of free will. I use it to explore not just the face of God represented by men, but the whole of him seen through the heart of his creation."

29: A Spiritual Reckoning Is the earth telling us that it is a time of reckoning? While I believe that we do co-create our lives here by our thoughts and actions, it is impossible to ignore the many changes happening in the world today. I believe it is truly a time to seek spiritual truth. Even though I am in conflict about doctrines and the truth about All that God truly is, I am at peace with the lessons and truths that Jesus taught, about being God's son, and dying so that I may live. I continue to learn who I am and how to live my life, yet I don't claim to understand all the meanings of His words and teachings. Would I have followed Jesus while He was still on this earth? I believe so. Can I follow His teachings while I am on this earth? I believe so by listening to His Spirit that lives in me. It just comes down to that very basic and simple truth that frees me from any other pressures that men try to impose. I have no doubt that we will all be asked to search our hearts soon to find the truth of what spiritual faith lives there. What do you believe and will that be enough to see you through? | In order to learn about the other side of God and humanity, we have to step outside of our box. But I have also learned, it is good to step back inside your comfort zone once in awhile to revisit where you came from. | We waste a lot of our lives worrying about what people will think when they see us when we should be considering what they will think when they get to know us.

30: Some Poetry... (About Chimerism) | Tenez Notre étoile Pour Moi We Arrived Together Yet You Are The Stranger Who Has Come To Reside Between The Mirror And The Soul Who Can Claim This Life That Began Of One Mind These Fragments Of Thought With No Pointe Of Grace All Those Things Someone Else Never Would Become Has Sought You Out Among The Other Stars And Hiding Behind The Reflection Of The Suns Coiled Ray Is The Scene Of A Life A Wish, A Dare Playing Out, Unwinding Joy Fleeting And Undependable Like A Kiss of Coal Who Promised To Become More.

31: Yet More Was Only The Hope Of The Other One Who’s Fire Was Released By The Breath Of Knowing. It Is No Longer Enough To Hold The Vision Of Trying To Begin That Life That Never Was More Than A Reflection, Of Thoughts That Came Before, Of A Hope That The End Would Be Better Now The Last Ray Dances And The Final Curtain Has Begun To Close The Last Image Will Be The Cloth Of That Dream Touching Both Sides Of The Mirror That Reflected A Thought That Never Became. ~ Adieu, Mon Jumeau Tenez Notre étoile Pour Moi "Hold Me For Our Star"

32: That Guy... We have all known someone in our lives that repels us. In our minds or hearts we say "Look at that Guy. They said this, they are that, how can they do that, or I will never be like that." I realized the other day that I have wasted many hours just trying to figure out why people do what they do. I thought if I could comprehend where they were coming from, then I could somehow justify their actions. Or maybe I just wanted to define our differences so I could feel better about myself. So, what do you do when you wake up one day and realize "You are that Person?" Somewhere along the years, you have forgotten the vision you had for what you wanted to become, or you look in the mirror and see someone you never intended to be. What happens when you feel the bitterness dripping from your words, or hear yourself screaming because you have become "entitled." What happens when you have forgotten how to do things for yourself because others have been doing them for you? What do you do when you see that you have been feeding your soul with judgment? How do you escape from the hole you have dug with unhappiness? | About Being Human...

33: It takes courage to look at ourselves, and to look fully. This is very humbling. The next step is about forgiveness. We need to remember that this is just a state that we have allowed ourselves to get to, and we can turn around and start walking the path that takes us back to that vision. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter when we let go of God's hand, we just need to hold it. At the end of the day, we don't need to look at "that guy" to feel better about our differences, we should just have mercy because of our sameness.

34: Within the Mind of God,”there is held a reservation for all of his creation. So while we can never be together in this same space, we will meet again in that sacred place where time and space is not relevant. We are welcome to come at any time and enter into the great banquet room of Fatherly love where healing is abundant. There are many doors into this infinite place where souls gather, but we will find that the teachings of Christ lead to that great room of unconditional love and peace. Entering this room is to return home to where we began our spiritual journey, just as physical death is returning to what this body began as, “substance of this great earth.”That is why we feel at home in nature, but also have peace of mind when we enter the Mind of God through prayer and meditation. Respecting and nurturing this earth is tending to the substance of our Brothers, Sisters, Mothers, and Fathers. | Dream Writings

35: So who are we to block others from entering into this sacred place that God has reserved for us? Instead of being a sentinel at all doors, we need to just hold the light of Christ so all can see the path to that Great Banquet Hall. Allowing others to wade through the doctrines of men means leaving all doors open and brings understanding to the words of entering Just As I Am. So instead of judging where others have been or are coming from, let our focus be only on welcoming all souls to the place where Jesus resides. Let our thoughts, which become words which then become the energetic matter of action, be of love and mercy. So what is the purpose of this spiritual to physical manifestation, then back to spiritual journey? Perhaps it is a journey of seeking to understand all of who God is. To be able to look upon Him from a new place, or a new “face. All that I know for sure is that I am very tired and yet I feel that it is now the time for my real work to begin. The challenge is when one part of us becomes more reality than the other, spirit. body or this earthly home. Just A Dream After Losing Dad

36: The Window Between Worlds I found myself returning to that space/gap between Father and Thou when I realized that I was choosing to stay there and not move on to the next gap between words, space, and time. I moved farther into that space where I saw myself crying out to my Father to come back, and then I sat down to weep. I felt many souls in that space where time has many intersections, yet I remained alone with my grief. Then I saw myself sitting behind a window in another space watching myself and knew that I was the one who needed to reach out and bring that part of me back because I did not belong in that space yet. It was I, not my Father who needed to return. | About Depression...

37: It was then that I knew it was time to no longer seek what was behind the glass of that window that separates worlds, but to turn and be fully present in this room. I heard a bird speak, and felt the sun returning because it, as I, belongs in this place. I lovingly laid my shawl upon the well-worn chair and walked to a door that led to another room. As I placed one foot across the threshold, I turned and looked longingly at my familiar place by the window between worlds. As I fully face the breath of this new day, I know that my shawl will be waiting for me when that final sunset whispers.

38: More Poetry... | ~ Messages of Shadow ~ Queen Anne promises sanctuary In the changing of her lace.... But peace only teases me. ...Dragonfly speaks of maturity and Depth of character Forged through the laces of time.... But the depth has buried me. Stallions tell stories of discovering Grace in freedom.... But time has me shackled. The Lake shivers with waves Of my unconscious mind... But freedom is afraid to see me. Goldfinch sings about the power of voice And the value of my change.... But consciousness holds my breath.

39: A Child looks up and sees the Reflection of God in my eyes.... But my voice only whispers brokenness. Paws in the forest tread on Healed scars of vulnerability.... But only Justice knows their silence. Susan's Black Eyes offer encouragement To motivate dreams... But Vulnerability has left me impartial. This road has well worn marks carved from the heart of restlessness.... But I will stop now and sleep in this grave dug by a frantic soul left wondering.

40: About Bullying.... We are all responsible for doing our part in seeing that we promote healthy relationships in our homes, schools, and our workplaces. This poem is just my vision of what it takes to promote nondiscrimination in the workplace. | I Had A Dream In my dream, I was in a meeting where a new manager-leader was introducing her-himself. This is what was said: “As your manager/leader, I will make these promises and I expect you to hold me to them.” What I will do: I will respect all staff/team members regardless of race, religion, culture, education, or any other thing that makes us individuals. Despite our differences, we are one team. I will support you and encourage you to be your best because I am not intimidated by the gifts you bring to the job. I will always try to be aware of your needs to carry out the best job possible. If I don't notice, I encourage you to ask for help because asking for help is not a weakness, it is what it is.... You just need help. I will value the life experiences you bring to our team. We gain life experience not only from our achievements, but from our mistakes. I will expect everyone to pull their weight. This translates into: If you expect others to do your job by making excuses about why you can't do what you have been trained to do, you may as well start looking for another team to play on.

41: What I will not do: I will not demean you by discussing you with any other staff/team member in a negative manner ever. I will not have favorites. We may play different roles on this team, but all of us are of equal importance. I will not listen to gossip. Gossip is a tool that bullies use to manipulate others, including their victims. I will not ever say, You should already know that, when any of my team members ask any question. Questions don't represent ignorance or stupidity. Asking a question means that you are asking for the support you need to do your best job. I will not talk to you as if we were in a kindergarten classroom for adults. Underneath the hat we wear to work, a leader should recognize we are also wearing a Mother, Father, Daughter, Son, Brother, Sister, Teacher, Counselor, or any other hat that represents who we are before, during, and after we clock in and out. I will not devalue you by dismissing any problem you discreetly bring to me about another team member by justifying bad behavior or by telling you that you are an adult and you should be able to handle it yourself. It is my job as your manager-leader to help my team resolve conflict. If we cannot resolve it together, you will not have to decide whether to go above me, I will be responsible enough to see my limitations in the matter and take that initiative for you. The problem will be resolved so we can continue to be a winning team. I had a dream. Then I woke up and cried myself to work.

42: A New Years Eve Musings... | It is the night before Life, I am alone in my Temple. Focused on the vastness of my journey that Dawn will bring I place my Cross of Purpose into the flames, Then calmly swallow it. Feeling the fire scorch of it's Truth Searing my Soul, So if I forget who I am or* Why I have came this way, In myBlindness I can reach out To find those who can Touch my Soul, And use the Impression that my Cross has left Against the Light of the NewMoon To Reflect my way Home. 2007

43: I walk quietly in the forest Boar by my side in peace. I stand tall among the trees Bear shoulder to shoulder in strength. I stretch up to the mountain In silent agreement with the howls of Wolf. I run through the underbrush In quiet play with Skunk. I sleep in the caverns Curled among Coyote pups. I fly up to visit Father On the back of Hawk. He says this is the year To put down my bows And walk among my brothers In silent peace and ride the Waters of change with Love. I will breathe in Harmony Safe in Mother's bosom. 2012 | New Years Day...

44: About Judgment... | Judgment is something I have been trying to completely separate from, but we will always have people and things that don't resonate with us. When I find myself judging, I try to go deep inside and see who that person really is and try to find something to love them for. This usually dispels my indignant anger. My question is..... how do you move forward with change if you are not judging something that you feel is not just? Are you not judging? Where do you find the balance between being a silent witness and shouting out to the world. As I was writing that I thought about Martin Luther King Jr., and he seemed to speak about how he moved forward in love because he was judging the situation, not the people. So, when I see a situation, like bullying, I need to see the fear in the bully, and then turn my focus to changing the situation. So power is in knowing the truth so I know where I stand, being comfortable with my stand, focusing on the change that needs to happen, and then making a step toward that change. Then I can become the change I want to happen.

45: "Exchange the need to be an image you've imagined you should be for a passion for living as you are and relieve the burden of judgment from yourself and others | Things I learned from my Grandson, Jacob. One Sunday he played a solo on the piano (The B-I-B-L-E) in front of the church congregation. He messed up and said, Let me start over."He did that about 5 times before he got it right. I was so proud of him for continuing to try because he knew that he could play it. I wonder how many times we quit trying when we just don't get it the way we want it. Is it because deep down, we don't really believe we can? Is it because we are too concerned about those who are watching? Perhaps a little of both. Can you be a Christian and still mess up? If not, then no true Christians exist. So I want to tell my friends and family that I will not judge you for failing to be what you perceive others want you to be. I will only love you because you are you. So, like Jacob, keep playing your song until it sounds like you want it to.

46: Whispers From The Root As the Mississippi sunset kisses me goodnight, Her sweetness nourishes my soul. The land my feet rests upon does remember Footprints of ancestors from not so long ago. The cool breeze from magnolia trees carries laughter of family who played under their limbs. In the stillness, I can hear cotton fields still crying For all those who labored to harvest them.

47: Owl, the keeper of sacred knowledge, Proudly protects the spirits who speak About clay who holds the magic, Able to heal the grief of hearts. I sit in this space where sounds of this life have become silent. Yet, it is in this place of silence that life and death gather to tell their story. As the Mississippi sunset kisses me goodnight, Her sweetness comforts our soul. ~ | Remembering my Bell-Pilgrim-Barnes-Bates Heritage....

48: Creating Harmony Through Personal Boundaries Personal boundaries are not just lines we draw around us, they protect the door to our physical, emotional, and spiritual health. Learning to understand our own boundaries helps us to protect our hearts by being present each time that door is opened. Our emotions can be called sentinels that alert us when someone is trying to open that door without knocking and asking permission. Therefore we can make conscious choices by listening and acknowledging our emotions. Understanding our boundaries helps us to say "no" without feeling guilty. Unburdened, we are then free to appreciate and nurture our healthy relationships. By maintaining healthy personal boundaries we attract those who motivate us to live an authentic life. So how do we define our personal boundaries? Creating a list of our core morals is a good place to start. What are the things that are important to us and we wish to be defined by?

49: My list of core values: Honesty, Family, Honoring Individualism, Good Work Ethic, Team Work, Nonjudgmental attitude, Integrity, Appreciating Nature, Being Loving, and Being Merciful. We add to our lists as we change and grow. When I made my list I could see right away that I have many, many times violated my own boundaries. How do we violate personal boundaries? By not being true to ourselves.....

50: A conversation between my Grandson, Javin, & I Me: "Tell me your description of an Angel." Javin: "Ummm...They don't have wings. Nowhere in the Bible does it say they have wings... Me: "Have you read the whole Bible?" Javin: "Yes, in Church they have gone over the Bible about 5 times. And I don't want to be inappropriate, but they have both sexes, male and female." Me: "Oh, really?" Javin: "Yes, they are both. And I don't know if this is true or not, but they're not preachers of the Bible, they're just messengers. They're just figures, but they play a big part in the Bible. The main people that preach the Bible are the disciples and Jesus." Me: "What would you think if something appeared to you and said they were an angel?" Javin: "Well, I probably wouldn't believe them because I have seen ghosts and they're not too pleasing." | About Angels...

51: Me: "So Angels are messengers from God?" Javin: "Angels can't just go to the grocery store, do you know what I mean? Like ok, they can't just get up and walk away. The main reason for Angels is for God to have a form. God is probably standing right there in front of the TV, but we can't see him. He uses angels to put himself in form so people can see him. But if God just came here to talk to a girl, she'd probably just put her blanket over her head and cover her ears. A boy would probably just freak out." Me: "Why?" Javin: "Because boys can get violent if they didn't know it was God, they might try to shoot him... With a toy gun of course." Wow.... So girls just hide and cover their ears. Is this because they are too scared to listen? And boys just react and try to kill what they fear. Hmmmm. So, if I am interpreting this conversation right, I may be seeing God right in front of me, but I'm too scared to hear what He is saying? I do love my Angel named Javin. :) (Conversation not to be taken too seriously) | A CranioSacral Treatment

52: Lynda Bell 2009

53: I am so blessed to have such an incredible family to support me. This little book of thoughts would not be complete without thanking my husband, Ray Wooden. While he hasn't always agreed with my paths, he has always given me the freedom to walk them. And that is life......

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  • By: Lynda W.
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  • Title: A Little Bit of This and A Little Bit of That
  • Thoughts on Life
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  • Published: almost 8 years ago