S: I Look to You!
FC: Faith Pages Journal | In the Midst of thisJourney
1: Inspired by the lyrics sung by Whitney Houston: "As I lay me down, heaven hear me now, I'm lost without a cause, after giving it my all, Winter storms have come, and darkened my sun. After all that I've been through, Who on earth can I turn to? I Look to you. I look to you. After all my strength is gone, in you I can be strong. I Look to you, I look to you. And when melodies are gone, in you I hear a song. I look to you. Bought to lose my breath, theres no more fighting left. Sinking to rise no more, searching for that open door, every road that I I've taken, led to my regret. I don't know if I'm gonna make it. Nothing to do but lift my head. I look to you. I look to you. And when all my strength is gone, in you I can be strong. I look to you. I look to you. And when melodies are gone, in you I hear a song. My levies are broken. The walls are coming tumbling down on me, rain is coming down on me, take me far away from the battle. I need you to shine on me. I look to you. I look to you.
2: The Peanuts
3: This book is written from the heart. It is a means of capturing my thoughts in a safe, non-threatening manner. It provides an outlet for my frustrations and fears. It catches my tears, calms the anger, and holds the thoughts I dare not share.
4: Doing the Work | Clearing Negative Beliefs About Others | A negative belief is a thought form held in consciousness that gives rise to or supports negative emotions that limit and restrict possibilities.
5: Calling in the good | Lord, it is so hard to keep it positive. When I look at the picture , I'm not sure what emotion I feel. I have moved pass numbness. I don't seem to feel anything.
6: Compassion does not strip a person of their dignity, nor does it deny them the dignity of their process.. | All rights reserved :Iyanla Vanzant & Inner Visions Institute
7: Compassion is the precursor to forgiveness. | Compassion | Compassion relates to the ability to see yourself in the position of another, to feel what they feel and to offer tender support, empathy and understanding for what the individual may be experiencing, without seeing them as weak. | Doing the Work | Compassion allows you to stand with a person, holding the vision of their wholeness, regardless of the situation or circumstances they may face.. | Without compassion there will always be judgments which obstruct mental and emotional energy and faculties.
8: Adapted from "One Day My Soul Just Opened Up" by Iyanla Vanzant
9: Only when you have a healthy, honorable, affirming relationship with yourself can you have the same with others. This relationship is the foundation of your ability to demonstrate and practice compassion. Only when you have truly mastered yourself and are able to stand in your sense of personal power can you be compassionate. If this is not the truth of your being, your attempts to be compassionate will mean being too nice and you will become a doormat. You will believe that you are being used. You will feel put upon and eventually become resentful of all that you have done or are doing for others. It is only from a sense of true and authentic personal power that you can give, support, share, and assist without feeling that you are losing anything. When you are a powerful master of yourself, you know that what you give is of the universal divine energy flowing through you. It is not yours, it belongs to life. When a powerful person gives life, s/he knows they cannot be depleted. Instead they know they are being strengthened. You must be strong in order to be compassionate.
10: Everyday I ask myself, am I hiding behind this ring. I have come to find comfort in it. Is it a crutch? Without it, I am nothing, but with it, I am also... nothing. So why do I hold on to it? Because it tells the world that I am somebody who belongs to somebody... but... not really. When I left my mother's house, I was running for my life. I found "a life" in Mr. Rollins, but was it the life I wanted. Initially, yes, but what happened? To this day, I continue to fight for this marriage, but he cannot be who I need. I know that now, so what do I do? I did stay at one point because of the kids, but I have been told, that was the wrong reason to stay. In my world, it was not. If I had to do it again, I would if there were kids involved. For all I tried to do, this family is still broken. I was broken and tried with all my might to keep it from happening. What I know for sure is that you can't make adults do ANYTHING.
31: Don't lose the magic! "Whoever has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him." Passage from the Holy Scriptures "And (remember) when God proclaimed: 'If you are grateful I will give you more; but if you are ungrateful verily my punishment is indeed severe.'" Passage from the Koran
33: It amazes me how quick folks are to offer their opinion on what I should or should not have done as a parent. It is easier to speak from a distance than to be right up in the face of defiance. After I preach, teach, cry and pray,I am finally able to stand and wipe the snot from my nose. As I slowly emerge from my emotional stupor, I stand there numb, trying to see through eyes swollen shut. I can hardly make out the faces staring back at me, but when I do, I realize they belong to the ones I call family. So hypocritical, so judgmental, , so removed & absent. As dawn turns to dusk, they creep back into their nothingness, peering out often threw minuscule cracks in their faces. Afraid to miss the next opportunity to judge me once again. A Broken Mother | July 13, 2013
38: Save My Son Father, I just want my son to have the opportunities of a lifetime. No one wants to take responsibility for him with me by helping me to teach him the right things. His father even takes a hands off approach. This leaves me to make all the hard decisions on my own. It is not fair to the child to not allow him to do anything because you are selfish and don't want to be blamed if something goes down. He is not a bad child. He is just being the typical 18 year old young man who wants to be out and about with the boys. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It is very amazing to me that everyone wants to tell me what they would do if they were his mother, but no one truly takes responsibility for him when he is with them. They run to tell me all the things he has done. No one taking the time to take the young man by the arm and whisper a little wisdom in his ear. It truly saddens me to know that my family is like that. Of course, I am frowned upon for my decisions. But I thank God that I am able to make the decisions that I have made. I consult him first, and I trust that he will provide for him and protect him.
88: Mr. Robert Eugene Patton
90: May 3, 2017 I wish I could explain the way I am feeling at this moment. I have never felt more alone in my entire life, yet I feel like its where I need to be. So much is going on in my head. I have a hole where my heart is supposed to be.