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Diary of Marianne

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FC: Diary

1: Marianne Dashwood

2: Fanny are coming to live here at Norland Park. The estate has gone to our brother and we girls have been left with nothing. Fanny and John treat us as if we are leeches, so i feel we should leave— we have to move somewhere else! I cannot bear the thought of leaving Norland, but go we must to escape these leeches. I do not know, however, where we will go for we have no money. | 18— Fanny‘s brother Edward has come to stay with us! And Elinor seems to fancy Edward! Except I don’t understand it . . . there is no passion! How can they be so stoic in their relationship! | 18— Oh, my soul aches! Today my dear father passed away. I just cannot fathom that he is gone. My step-brother, John, and his wife

3: 18— I have found perfection at last! His name is John Willoughby. My knight! My divine lover! I guess I should start from the beginning. . . I was walking with Margret, and I twisted my ankle. Willoughby rescued me just like a knight of old. Now he and I do everything together. Elinor does not approve of course; she is deprived of passion I think. Maybe one day he and I will be married! Oh, how I hope so! Marianne Willoughby. Marianne Willoughby. Mrs. John Willoughby. I like the sound of that. I love him dearly. No one really understands. He is smart, handsome, wonderful, sweet, and passionate. | Does she not feel anything for him? Does he love her? I wish they would show something before time separates them—or should I say Fanny separates them. I am completely bewildered.

4: He often comes and visits me at Barton Cottage. Colonel Brandon does not seem to like him, but Brandon is a stuffy stick, so his opinion is not of much importance. I cannot understand why anyone would not love Willoughby. | 18— My heart is breaking. I cannot believe how quickly my dearest had to go to London. I miss him greatly. Oh John when will I see you again? I have cried until my eyes hurt. I have played every song we ever played and each song brings you back. Oh, if my grief was only enough. I have gone on for days and still the grief comes. John, I love you so much.

5: 18— I am in London! Maybe I will get to see my dearest Willoughby. I am putting up with that rotten Mrs. Jennings | 18— Willoughby! I am sobbing. I cannot believe how he treated me. At the party he ignored me! What kind of man can be so kind one day and so utterly emotionless the next? Apparently he is, and has been, engaged to another woman. I do not understand why he treated me as if he loved me and then turn around and send me a letter saying he never loved me. I thought he | just so I may catch a glimpse of him. I have left him notes, but he still has not called. Someone said he may be hunting, but the weather is awful so I assume he will be in town soon. Here I am waiting.

6: loved me! Everyday his actions told me he did. I am trying to excuse him, but I do not know if I can. I want to leave London this | very minute. I feel as if my life is over. Elinor says we cannot leave yet because it will be rude. Why do we have to be polite when Mrs. Jennings is always rude to us? Elinor says she is trying to be helpful, but all i know is that she is an insufferable woman. She likes getting gossip out of anyone, and so she inflicts herself on me trying to get a story. And so I am lost forever. I will be an old maid. | 18— I have been deathly ill. I made myself sick thinking about Willoughby. So much has happened since my selfish grief. I am now

7: engaged to Colonel Brandon. I do not know why I ever thought he was stuffy and boring. While I was sick, he was there for me. When I was delirious I wanted my mother, so he rode out to fetch her. Although I always thought one who has truly loved can never love again, I truly love Brandon. I now realize through Elinor's example and me almost dying, how selfish I always was. In my grief over Willoughby, I caused my family to grieve. I even treated people who always tried to be kind, Mrs. Jennings for example, like dirt. So I am turning over a new leaf. I will be polite and I will control my emotions. I will improve myself in reading books, and I am going to look to Elinore for guidance. My life will never be the same, and I am happy for it.

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About This Mixbook

  • Title: Diary of Marianne
  • Tags: None
  • Started: over 7 years ago
  • Updated: over 7 years ago